So, now all the big! season! finales! are over and the cliffhangers are hanging and in the Olden Days we would take the lack of new primetime television as a sign that it was time to take a walk OUTSIDE, or some such crazy shit. Now we just turn on our television and curse out the TiVo for recording nothing but Yo Gabba Gabba and the 40th rerun of last Friday's episode of The Soup and that one weird show about the model trains that your father-in-law figured out how to record that one time.
And then we start searching for our Summer show. You know what I mean. It's rarely a show that's actually ON in the summer, but some other show that you've never seen and is now in reruns so eh, you'll give it a try. Or some really random show on some random cable network that airs like, seven episodes a day so you get a little obsessed with it and watch it every night, episode after episode, drinking in the bounty which shall never end, mwa ha ha…until you blow through every goddamn season and episode in like, three weeks flat and it's not even the end of June.
That last kind of show? I HAS ONE.
I am insane about Top Gear on BBC America. Those of you who watch Top Gear are probably like, "OH MY GOD HOW HAVE YOU NEVER WATCHED TOP GEAR?" Those of you who do not watch Top Gear are probably like, "What?"
So…yes. Top Gear is a British car show. It is about cars. Often British cars. Little squat minis that you can't buy here or super-crazy-expensive specialty cars that you can't buy anywhere, unless you are a bazillionaire. Sometimes there are celebrity guests, who are also usually British and from British shows they don't air on BBC America. They then make these celebrity guests drive a Reasonably Priced Car around a race track and rank their completion time. The three hosts make fun of each other constantly, play pranks on each other, buy beater POS cars and drive the crap out of them across Africa and Vietnam, almost got beat up by American rednecks, attempt to parallel park humungous luxury vehicles in downtown London and once hosted a traditional fox hunt while having the horses and dogs track an off-roading vehicle. That they'd painted like a fox. And attached a tail soaked in fox piss to the rear bumper.
THAT'S Top Gear, and it's freaking hysterical. And I've watched about four dozen episodes in a week and there's something like 12 seasons total and that means there are at least four dozen more. Unless it's one of those British shows that make six episodes and call that a "season." Fuck. Then I'm screwed.
Quick…what dreck are you watching (and loving) this summer?