Look Out Street Signs of America, Heather Locklear’s Free!

Those fireworks last night? They were for Heather Locklear. While it was Independence Day for every American, it was particularly a day of freedom for the former Melrose Place resident bitchy bitch. You see, she just completed 30 days in a drug rehab facility and got herself sprung from the celebrity version of the clink. You see the ex-Mrs. Richie Sambora checked herself into rehab for a prescription pill problem after cruelly running down a ‘No Parking’ sign, fleeing the scene, and then denying it to the cops who dropped the case because SHE IS HEATHER LOCKLEAR AND WILL CUT YOU. And now she’s out! All fixed up and ready to face the world without the help of percocet and xanax and haldol and retin A. If that’s not cause for celebration I don’t know what is. Well, maybe not for the stop signs of America. Say no to drugs and god bless America.

And because it’s a holiday weekend and you have nothing better to do then remember the awesome that was the original Melrose Place, here:

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