ED NOTE: Every December the MamaPop writers offer up their selections for the best in pop culture and entertainment that year, and this year shall be no different. For these last few weeks of 2010, a different MamaPop writer (or two!) will share their personal picks for the year that was each weekday, and we hope you’ll share yours too, in comments.
Because I don’t have a relationship of my own, it’s pretty important that the ones on mah stories are realistically and spicily portrayed. These were the fails of 2010:
1. Dexter and Lumen
Where does my favourite serial killer find love after the tragic loss of his former stripper wife, Robin Rita? In the arms of a blood-thirty gang-rape victim, of course.
2. Chouse/Huddy/Chuddy/Houddy
They’ve only been building up to this for eons. Like, for the entire show. And it is so damn painful to see House be such a pansy, now that he’s in Cuddy’s chonies.
3. Rachel and Finn
I want to stab her for existing, and I want to slap him for spanning time with her neurotic, show-boating ass. Especially since she didn’t let him in her chonies.
4. Alex and Lexie
What happens when you cross an emotionally-unavailable douche-wad with a brunette-then-blond, doe-eyed, super genius with feelings? Role play: she’ll pretend to be his once-dead wife when he gets nearly-fatally shot.
5. Shane and Sara
Because there isn’t enough drama, what with all of the dead cannibals and all, these two got cozy in the forest for all of three minutes that one time. And then she was all my husband is alive! and then he was all I would trade places with him in a second and then she had to whip out some claws. Of course, I’m summarizing.
6. Catherine and Rita Robin
Of course the once-Stepford-wife, turned psychopath, turned I Was Just Lonely But I’m Feeling Much Better Now character of Catheirne needed a change. How about an identity change and running away from Desperate Housewives into the lesbian sunset with Dexter’s dead wife a former stripper?
7. Sarah and Gordon
Recycling her Gilmore Girls’ character into the packaging of Sarah Braverman didn’t stop her from seeing how slimy Alec Baldwin (okay, fine, GORDON) was from a mile away. I guess transitional, completely-unrelated characters just never learn.
You know what didn’t suck about relationships in 2010? Finding out that Brittany Murphy and Simon Monjack died because of something natural. At least until Randy Quaid proves they were killed off by a covert committee.
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