His hair used to grow baaaaack. That mothereffer don’t know where it’s aaaaat. Take it to the briiiiiiiiiiidge!
Justin Timberlake, that insanely and unassailably likable pop star and unlikely comedian, is having normal guy problems. Having split with long-time love Jessica Biel, he was rumored to have been rebuffed by Friends With Benefits co-star Mila Kunis. Then, one-time Maxim “Hot 100″ champeen Olivia Wilde and J.T. land squarely in “the friend zone.” Ouch. Poor Justin. All he can do wipe his tears with cash money (“$100 bills, y’all”), watch reruns of his critically acclaimed turns on Saturday Night Live, kiss his adorable knees for helping him duck the Britney bullet, and runs his fingers through his luxurious curly…oh.
Because, a “friend” tells InTouch, Justin Timberlake is losing his hair. Justin–was it Will Smith or Socrates who said–if they talk to InTouch you don’t need ‘em, cuz they’re not good friends.
“You will not see my bald spot.” *Jedi hands* “I will not see your bald spot.”
The friend reports that Timberlake’s hair has been thinning for awhile, hence the close-cropped cut. And Justin–whose naturally curly sandy locks catapulted him to McCartney status (“the cute one”) as part of N’Sync–is reportedly mortified. He’s even trying thickening shampoos and restorative treatments. In other words, he’s acting like any other 30-year-old guy being kicked in the junk by Father Time.
But what might be hard to watch in some other dude (desperate midnight calls to Hair Club for Men, wrestling a 50-year-old accountant for the last bottle of Rogaine foam at the SuperTarget), only makes Justin Timberlake more charming. “OMG! He’s losing his hair and he’s shy about it! ADORABLE!”
And now you’re going bald. Let that be a lesson to you, Ill-Advised Cornrow Jones.
I, for one, find it hard to believe that J.T. is phased by his thinning hair. He’s the New Clooney, supremely confident with a heaping helping of “I can’t believe I’m good at everything, either” *wink wink*. But if you are depressed about your hair, Justin, just remember: you won an Emmy for putting your genitals in a cardboard box. I don’t know what that has to do with anything…I just thought it might take everyone’s minds off your thinning hair.
You’re welcome.
About Molly Martin
