Have maternity leave/extended bed rest/house arrest coming up? Jonesing for a good legal drama? Wondering how to spend that $700 you found in your jeans pocket the other day?
Those were rhetorical questions, Meloni, GOD.
NBC is releasing a 104-disc comprehensive Law & Order box set, complete with 456 episodes from the original series and all the crossovers and spinoffs it spawned. There are also 11 seasons in the set that never aired on network TV (HOW IS THIS POSSIBLE?!) just in case you were craving more gritty, big-city crime drama set against a background of navy blues and earth tones.
Christ, would it KILL one of you to don a jaunty red scarf?
The box set is scheduled for a November 8th release, which means it’ll be out just in time to keep you entertained during the long, cold winter. Hey—maybe there will be one of those massive snowstorms to keep you housebound! That’s the perfect opportunity for watching something like, uh, 456 hours of television (plus special features), right?
She died as she lived: dozing pantsless with the DVD menu looping endlessly in the background.
I am finding it hard to believe that anyone is actually going to shell out close to a grand for all of those episodes. I mean, we’ve all gone through our “addicted to Law & Order” phases before, but…is it really that hard to satisfy your urge to watch Lennie Brisco and Mr. Big solve crimes? I’m pretty sure all you ever have to do to catch an episode of any strain of Law & Order is turn on your TV and check maybe five channels. Chances are, you’ll hear that infamous double gavel bang on one of them.
NOTE TO SELF: sell rights to legal-themed adult film entitled “Double Gavel Bang.” Here comes the judge, etc.
Personally, I think the only way I’d spend that much cash purchasing (or invest that much time watching) a box set would be if they came out with some highly specialized collections, like the “Clips of Laurie Metcalf on Roseanne” box set, or the “Creepiest Micheal Shannon Moments” collection, or the “Twelve Hours of Anna Paquin Being Highly Annoying” DVD.
Oh look. They already sell one of those.
Anyway, as much as I’ve enjoyed me some Law & Order in the past, I won’t be taking out a second mortgage on the house to purchase the complete box set. Sorry, guys. I love you, but not that much.