The massacre at the Festival of Tolerance/PR Nightmare is still going strong, with Nan thinking quickly and knocking over any nearby cameras. Marnie is controlling Eric as he moves in to kill Bill. Bill fires a couple silver bullets, which doesn’t seem to deter Eric at all. Sookie tries to step in between them, but Eric grabs a flag or a mic stand to stake Bill. Sookie shouts, “NO MORE!” and does a dramatic port de bras, emitting two balls of white light and striking Eric with them. This stops Eric and has the unfortunate side effect of restoring all of his memories. Stunned by the impromptu pyrotechnics, Antonia surveys the carnage and asks herself, “What have I done?” Antonia’s physical appearance briefly takes over Marnie’s, until she grabs Troy and disappears with him. “We have to help these poor people!” shouts Nan, before hissing, “Bill! Image!” Eric and Sookie glare at each other in that, “You used to try to ruin my life/kill me all the time until we started banging,” look that we all know so well.
Jason and Jessica are sitting in the flatbed, basking in their post-coital guilt fest. Jessica points out that, technically, they didn’t do anything wrong, but Jason is extremely torn up over Hoyt. “Talk about bromance,” snarks Jessica. Jason rattles off his list of Awesome Things He Did for Hoyt Prior to Banging His Recent Ex-Girlfriend. Jason mutters that none of this would have happened if he hadn’t drunk Jessica’s blood. Jessica is pissed off by this comment, but not pissed off enough, because, um, hi, she saved Jason’s life. Nevertheless, Jason wants Jessica to glamor him so he can forget that it all ever happened and Jessica…well, Jessica can just deal with it, I guess. What really matters is that Jason and Hoyt are happy together. God. Jason’s pillow talk…er, flatbed talk is terrible. Jessica storms off, disgusted, declaring that she’s going to find somebody to eat.
Alcide is racing Tommy to the hospital, but Tommy is in really bad shape. Apparently skinwalking’s effects are exponential. The first time, you lose your lunch. The second time, you vomit blood and die. Tommy convinces Alcide that the hospital won’t help him and that he needs to go to Merlotte’s. Perhaps he needs a restorative bowl of chili.
At Moon Goddess, the imprisoned witches are trying to find good cell reception. Holly tells Tara that she thinks they can work a counter spell to escape. Antonia returns and is vague about the success of the Festival of Tolerance, even though Troy is bubbling over with blood thirst. A few of the witches try once again to appeal to Antonia to let them go, but she calls them ungrateful and declares that they will stay together. Then she retires for a little conversation with her human host. Like ya do.
Back in Bill’s office, Nan asks him what the deal is with his little dairy maid and her lightning trick. She’s still working on how they’re going to spin the night’s events, invoking the Civil Rights Movement once again. But Bill blows up at her, saying that this is all her fault for not letting him kill Marnie when he had the chance. “We are going after the necromancer and taking her out. By any means necessary,” he says. Oh, for fuck’s sake, did he just invoke Malcolm X as the violent counterpart to Martin Luther King, Jr.? This show is really pissing me off.
Eric and Sookie are having an awkward “life after basketball shorts” conversation. He insists that he remembers everything about their relationship and that nothing is changed. Except, you know, he’ll start slicking his hair back again and speaking in his Intense Voice. Sookie looks extremely skeptical, and explains that while watching Eric moving in to kill Bill, she couldn’t bear the thought of a world without him. The problem is that she loves both of them. “How is that possible?” asks the 2,000-year-old vampire who has recently come out of a spell cast upon him by a 400-year-old dead witch inhabiting the body of a small business owner with the help of his fairy girlfriend. They quibble over who Sookie “belongs” to when Pam rushes in, relieved beyond belief that Eric is back. He explains that Sookie broke the curse and Pam responds, “Well. Thanks.” Gratitude! Pam is hurt that Eric didn’t summon her as soon as he was back. Eric wants to talk about it later, but I think it might have something to do with the fact that Pam is kind of a jackass. Sookie overhears Bill’s plans to blow up Moon Goddess and tells him that he can’t because Tara is there. Bill tells her that he can’t risk potential genocide because her friend is trapped. “Lovable, isn’t he?” snarks Eric. “And if people die?” asks Sookie. “It’s war. It happens,” replies Bill. Well, I don’t know about you, but I’m pumped.
Sam arrives at Merlotte’s as Alcide is gingerly taking Tommy out of the truck. Sam insists that they need to get him vampire blood, but Tommy refuses. “He’s got a right to choose his time,” says Alcide, and they carry him inside. They lay him out on the pool table and Sam gently tells him not to be afraid, that there’s, like, light and angels and Milk Bones and stuff. Despite being on his deathbed deathpooltable and choking on mouthfuls of blood, Tommy is still able to argue with Sam. But he ends up apologizing for skinwalking as him and having sex with his girlfriend and stealing his money and yadda yadda yadda. Sam quickly exonerates him and turns away for a moment, remarking that it’s, “So fucking sad.” And it is, I suppose, but I’m still trying to figure out why exactly Tommy went to beat up Marcus. Was it to help Sam or try to pay him back for all of the dumb stuff he did? I’m just confused. Anyway, Alcide calls Sam back over as Tommy is quickly fading. Tommy asks Sam not to forget about him right away and Sam replies, “You’re loved. I love you.” Tommy replies with a really disturbing death rattle and then dies. So…I guess that’s that. Unless we’re edging into the zombie chapter of True Blood. I mean, really, what else is left? Centaurs? Ligers? Sam vows that Marcus is a dead fucking wolf.
Hoyt interrupts the pity party that Jason is hosting for himself and starts babbling about how his house is empty but still full of reminders of Jessica. He wants to crash with Jason for awhile, so that he can drink beer and deny crying in more comfortable surroundings.
Terry and Arlene confront Andy about a vial of V that they’ve found. Arlene is worked up because they have three little kids in the house and one of them could have found it. Terry sends Arlene back to bed and tells Andy that it’s time to go to Fort Belle Fleur.
Jason has retreated to Sookie’s house to complain about Hoyt drinking 11 beers and then passing out and farting. Sookie agrees to let Jason stay there and then tells him about Bill’s plan to blow up Moon Goddess even though Tara is there. Jason doesn’t follow (shocking) and hasn’t even heard about the Festival of Tearing Your Guts Out that happened the night before.
Terry takes Andy to a treehouse that he lived in while he was recovering from his time in the Marines. Terry dealt with his PTSD by initially doing a lot of drugs, but now he’s not on any…well, except for the anti-psychotics. Andy insists that he’s a better man on V. Terry wants him to prove it through target practice. Yes. Let’s give these two some guns. Fabulous idea!
Sookie and Jason are at Lafayette’s telling him and Jesus about Moon Goddess. Jesus thinks that he can reach Marnie and she’ll help them to push Antonia out and send her back to whereever she came from.
Holly has found a counter spell but Tara is concerned about the Latin involved. Holly thinks they can fudge it and that the goddess will figure out what they mean if they just want it bad enough. Well…then…why bother with Latin? Why not just use English? Ugh. Tara just doesn’t think it will work but Holly points out that they’re currently imprisoned by a 400-year-old witch and there are two bewitched vampires in the ladies’ room and also they are four seasons into a show about vampires and now is not the time to express doubts, TARA. Meanwhile, Marnie is in another room writhing. Antonia comes bursting out of her mouth and they have a rather brief come-to-Jesus discussion about their crusade. Antonia’s having some moral quandaries and Marnie’s like, “Quit being a pussy.” They reconvene in Marnie’s body and are renewed in purpose. Yay for them.
Jessica, Bill, Nan, Pam, and Eric are all chained up in the basement. Nan is handing out True Death sentences to just about everybody. Jessica doesn’t care just as long as she gets to kill somebody. That’s a healthy attitude, Jessica. Git’r'done or whatever.
Jason, Sookie, Lafayette, and Jesus are stationed outside of Moon Goddess. Sookie listens in on the prisoners’ thoughts to glean the basics of the situation. Jesus volunteers to be the first one in, reasoning that Marnie trusts him and that he can reach her. Lafayette watches nervously as Jesus approaches the building. He’s repelled by some kind light force field. Antonia comes out and questions him and says that if he wants to enter he’ll have to break through the wall. Jesus pushes through. There’s lots of flailing and at one point he shifts into some kind of demonic creature. Lafayette explains it away as being, “a Latin thing.”
Debbie is at Marcus’s sounding kind of strung out. She’s dug out some of her old V-ho clothes and is bitching to Marcus about how Alcide doesn’t want to have kids. Marcus says that that’s ridiculous as he loves having a daughter to terrorize at will. Debbie’s like, “You seem like you would be an awesome father!” Oh, Debbie. Meanwhile, Sam and Alcide show up at Marcus’ garage and confront the only guy there, saying that the guy that they beat died. Sam gets all, “Hello! My name is Sam Merlotte! You kill my brother! Prepare to die!”
Andy and Terry shoot cans and talk about stuff and WHAT IS THE POINT OF THIS STORYLINE I’M SO LOST! Whatever, Terry makes Andy walk home.
Antonia is questioning Jesus about his abilities. She realizes that he has “the demon” to serve him and she wants Jesus and “the Moor” (Lafayette) to join their circle. Jesus asks to speak with Marnie and Antonia reluctantly agrees. Jesus is surprised to learn from Marnie that she is all about this possession deal and to prove it wants Jesus to feel her vibrations. Ew? She makes Jesus hold his hand up to hers and says, “C’mon! C’mon!” I am now convinced of one of Marnie’s powers: putting the Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch earworm in my head for an indefinite amount of time.
Stupid Marnie. Jesus manages to communicate to Sookie that the game has changed. Meanwhile, Holly and Tara are chanting and manage to escape. Antonia chases them outside where they have met up with Lafayette and Sookie. She makes everyone but Jason disappear. Jason kicks the ground, which I guess is an appropriate reaction.
That night, Eric, Bill, Pam, and Jessica arrive in a van. Apparently they forgot that they can just zoom from place to place. They’ve brought a rocket launcher. I have a feeling shit is about to get real up in this emporium.
About Kelly Delaney
