Internet, what in fuck’s name is Kate Gosselin yammering on about now?!
If it’s anything other than a formal apology for bringing this ridiculous hairstyle widespread exposure, I don’t want to hear it.
First of all, if you haven’t heard the glorious news, Kate Plus 8 has been canceled. You may recall the day this news broke as it was the same day the heavens opened up and a choir of singing cherubs poured forth.
And verily, Kate Gosselin lost a venue in which to exploit her plentiful offspring that day. “Take heed!” said the Archangel TLC, “For the destruction of Jon Gosselin’s Ed Hardy shirts cannot be far behind.”
On Monday, Kate turned up on Today with Matt Lauer, and boo-hoo’ed about the end of her show. Bemoaning the possibility that she might have to, you know, get a job out here in Real Reality instead of Reality TV, Kate decided to give the following response to her ex-husband Jon’s assertion that “reality TV is not a career and it’s time to get back to a normal life”:
“It’s a situation where Jon may be accepting of mediocre for his kids and working a regular job. I want the best for my kids and the best opportunities, not unlike every parent. I think that to be a good parent is to work as hard as you can and give them the best opportunities in life, and [our show] has provided that.”
Man, is my face red! Here I’ve been, toiling away at my regular job in order to provide a stable life for my daughter and it turns out that this means I don’t want the best for her. SAD FACE!
Seriously, my friend. WHAT IN THE NAME OF STEAMING ASS FUCKITY BALLS IS THIS WOMAN TALKING ABOUT?!
It’s even more confusing than that eviscerated ostrich of a hat.
That’s more or less a rhetorical question, because I know exactly what she was doing: taking another pot-shot at her douchey ex, because–apparently–that matters more than, say, not constantly shit-talking her kids’ father on national television. Whatever gets her another reality gig, right?
Kate Plus Shit-for-Brains issued a half-assed apology via fucking Twitter yesterday:
“2clarify re ‘mediocre’ – I meant this job is not a career acc 2 jon but tv is 4 me & is hard but will prov best opps 4 my kids vs nursing!”
Yeah, nice try, but you’re still an insufferable woman with an inflated sense of entitlement who is so widely separated from reality that you think raising your kids in front of cameras and paparazzi is better for them simply because you make a lot of money doing it. How much you wanna bet each and every one of those kids would rather have a nurse for a Mom than a media-whoring harpy hell-bent on staying Us Weekly-relevant? I’m not much for superstitions or what have you, but I think ol’ Kate is all but begging for the universe to take her down a peg or two, and when that happens, she’ll be wishing for the days of tights budgets and nursing scrubs.
Also, good luck the next time you need medical attention, Kate. Those mediocre nurses can hold a mean grudge.
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