Who could have possibly seen this coming? Late last week, 20-year-old Mariah Yeater dropped her paternity suit against Justin Bieber. Not to be outdone, Mariah Yeater’s lawyers dropped her. Bieber had promised to take a paternity test as soon as he returned to the states and had also promised to counter-sue, so I guess the threat of possible jail time nipped Yeater’s dreams of stardom in the bud. If there’s one thing that’s worse than the thought of forever having your life intertwined with a twee little popstar’s, it’s spending a year in jail and also having the fact that you are a crazy, fame-seeking person become common knowledge. Okay, that’s two things. But THANK GOODNESS IT IS ALL OVER, right?

Of COURSE he's old enough to reproduce. Why would you even ask that? Look at that luxurious mustache.
Now that this whole debacle is all over, though, I can’t help but wonder: Who is the father? Can Bieber even make babies? And how long until Mariah Yeater gets her own reality show?
