Mmmmmm, tasty explosion-filled summer movies. While the majority of the world is already busy ogling The Avengers, we Americans have to occupy ourselves with other things until this weekend—namely, the release of the latest Dark Knight Rises trailer. Full confession: I am not that psyched about The Avengers. Now the giant piles of money it’s making will rise up from the sewers and rip me to shreds. Dark Knight Rises talk, on the other hand? BOOYAH, magic-tickle-fingers in the house! And not a moment too soon, I was getting tired of freaking out about Prometheus. (Just kidding! Not tired of that at all. I’m letting my inner geek out to play today, she needs some sunshine. Something something borg reference, Patrick Stewart, Daleks.)
Months ago, Warner Bros. began promoting the final installment in Christopher Nolan’s trilogy with an interactive viral marketing campaign: a treasure hunt with an exclusive trailer at the end of the rainbow. Now that sneak peek is available to the rest of us lazy saps who weren’t able to hunt down hidden real-life Batman graffiti, post pictures of it to twitter, and decode fake CIA documents. I’m guessing that was most of us, but hey, maybe you have a lot more time on your hands than I do.
Behold the latest gritty-rebooted-reboot-rebooten action:
Stop, stop, hold it in, no wait, gah, let it out– WHY SO SERIOUSSSSS?
That gave me the shivers, though admittedly if you throw some epic cord progressions behind footage of dogs farting I’d probably tear up at that too.
Immediate thoughts on the latest revelations? BATPLANE. BAT. PLANE. FLYING BAT-PLANE. Batplane. More objectively, I’m having a hard time coming on board with Anne Hathaway based specifically on what they’ve shown here. Her two quips make me wonder when she’s going to pull out her Disney tiara and knee socks. With any luck they’ll include a scene where she gets a hairbrush stuck on the side of her head and waxes her eyebrows. She can act, and I like her, but I’m gun-shy when it comes to anything involving cheesy lines and Batman. It’s gone too wrong before. Knowing what Nolan has done in the past, though, I’m willing to give him the benefit of the doubt that he can pull it off.
Careful, Catty-lady, I've been burned before. HOOOOOAH!
Outside the pussy talk, we’re mostly presented flashes of everything in Gotham going horribly, terribly wrong and hey! Alfred! and hey! Morgan Freeman! No wait back to footage of riots. They purposely haven’t included much about what’s happened to the Bat in the last eight years, or ANY of the characters, really, and the suspense is just precious. This is typical Christopher Nolan shlock set up, getting us all pumped and emotional, and we know that, but it’s still working for me so I’m not complaining. (If you’re interested in actual exposition about what the fuzz is going, on the previous Dark Knight Rises trailer is probably more informative, relatively speaking.) The new trailer is a tease, we’re not going to be able to get to the good stuff until we can see the whole picture in all its epic unfettered glory– these are just bits and pieces of the greater whole.
Since I’m guessing this isn’t going to be toddler-friendly, I’m already planning on this being one of the incredibly rare times each year we’ll dig up a babysitter and go to the theater like real adults who can pee at their leisure and eat popcorn without grubby little hands rubbing all over it. Batman is the epitome of cool, even to my toddler who, has as far as I know, has never seen anything Batman, but it’s fairly questionable how appropriate Nolan’s take on Batman is for kids. (We were once in the theater to see 300 with a lovely family and their enthusiastic toddlers. Please don’t be those people. Please.) If The Dark Knight Rises lives up to its two predecessors, it will be epic, deliciously dark, and very loud. Begin/resume countdown to July 20 date night…. now!
UNTIL THEN, GEEK PARTY AT MY HOUSE
About Jamie Jamerson
