The interwebz are a-buzz today with talk of the couple otherwise known as Brangelina and their wedding date.
The lack thereof, that is. Yes, that’s right. At this time, they are actively refusing to set a date.
(This ain’t ever gonna happen in our lifetimes, people. I’m calling it, right here, right now. MARK. MY. WORDS.)
The LA Times reports:
We know Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are getting married, we just don’t know when, and if Pitt is to be believed, neither do they. But if the gay marriage debate gets settled, it might be the day after that.
Pitt told reporters Tuesday at a news conference at the Cannes Film Festival they were “still hoping we figure out marriage equality in the States before that date.”
That should give Jolie plenty of time to pick out a dress. And shoes. Bridesmaids’ dresses — or tuxes — for their six kids. And get a man-pedi … 40 or 50 times.
Are they just trying to fool the paparazzi? That would be smart. But Pitt insisted that he and Jolie had not set a date — “actually, really, truly” no date.
Alright, let’s be real here, people. He literally might as well have said, “We’ll set a date when hell freezes over,” or “when all the children of the world join hands and sing songs of peace,” or “when Bret Michaels stops mutilating his own facial features by way of a surgeon’s scalpel.” In terms of actual, objective space-time, we’re pretty much talking equivalencies here.
...or we'll get married when I stop being almost DISTURBINGLY HANDSOME. READ: NEVAH!
And as far as I’m concerned? That’s okay. MORE than okay, in fact. And I realize I’m in the minority here, but you know the saying, youth is wasted on the young? Well, I’m of the opinion that marriage enthusiasm is wasted on the never-married. That sincere belief that by walking down the aisle and saying “I do” there is some magical completion that happens between two people — a tied-up-with-a-bow, cherry-on-top ecstatic and joyous culmination of beingness that solidifies Everything FOREVAH… it seems to me this is the perspective of people who have NOT been married. And relative to Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, we are most definitely talking about two people who HAVE been married, and have seen marriage fail and fall apart around them, MULTIPLE times. And so can you blame them for being not-so-eager, a little gun-shy — particularly in light of the fact that their relationship is, by all accounts, currently a very stable, secure, and happy one? Neither of them needs a piece of paper to confirm their love or their commitment to each other, or to their children.
When you have this many kids, it's kind of the commitment-equivalent of walking down the aisle 30,000 times. Give or take 5,000.
So why should they do it? What do they have to prove?
There’s been some speculation that the children ARE the reason — that the kids encouraged and asked for the marriage to some extent or other, and I suppose that’s something to be taken into consideration. But overall, I find myself annoyed by the general LET’S RUSH THEM TO THE ALTAR tone expressed by both the public and the media relative to this couple, and so many others. How many failed Hollywood marriages do we have to witness before we fully and completely get that marriage is not the answer to love’s question (to get all flowery and gross for a second) (sorry about that)? Until we get that, in fact, love doesn’t ever even need any kind of answer or response, other than for the people involved to enjoy, appreciate, and nurture it?
Ehh? Am I making any sense here? Is this thing on?
What do you all think? Do we place too much emphasis on marriage? Should Brad and Angelina just get it over with already (SWOON! How romantic!)? Or should they stand up and not bow to pressure from anyone – their own kids included? THOTS?
About Tracey Gaughran-Perez
