Listen, kids. It’s been a week over here for me. Mostly because of the Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart news, but also because of things like this hangnail I’m nursing and outfit planning dilemmas for Sparklecorn. SO! What better way to take our mind of the perils of this unsteady world in which we live than by immersing ourselves in celebrity culture?
LET’S DO IT.
Lady Gaga has finally begun her transition to full-fledged triple-threat entertainment star. Robert Rodriguez, director of movies like Sin City, is making a follow up to his film Machete, released earlier this year. Other cast members so far include Sophia Vergara and Jessica Alba. Charlie Sheen is even rumored to play the American President. My guess, then, is that Lady Gaga will be taking on the role of Prime Minister? THE ANTICIPATION!
Perhaps MORE exciting is the fact that Lady Gaga also tweeted out some pictures of that infamous sleepover she had with Lindsay Lohan a month or so back. OOOH! Fun game: LET’S GUESS WHAT DRUGS THEY’RE ON!
In equally unsettling news, Hootie and the Blowfish have refused to LIE DOWN. Darius Rucker, who has been making country music for quite some time (?!?!) told Billboard magazine that he would be reuniting with those other dudes to make some more music.
“There’s one more Hootie record and tour that we’re going to do,” said Rucker, who has spent the last four years as a country star. “I don’t know when, because country music is my day job — it’s what I want to do.”
GAH. (Moving right along…)
There’s some American Horror Story casting news and it’s looking BEE-YOO-TIFUL, letmetellyou. Adam Levine had been announced as a cast member some time ago, but now we finally know who his lover will be: Jenna Dewan, wife of the delicious Channing Tatum.
And now, let’s observe a moment of silence to honor that man’s pelvic bone.
Former porn star Bree Olsen inexplicably made a (semi-NSFW) music video with some guy named Mike Gonsolin. She “raps” most of it, but even that is autotuned. It’s as horrible as it sounds, and I’m not sure anyone who participated in the making of this video is aware of the irony.
And now let’s all wash our celebrity palette clean with some celebrity baby shots. David Beckham carries his adorably chubby daughter Harper to a lunch date with Posh Spice, Amy Poehler spends some time with son Archie on set of her latest movie, and Rachel Zoe continues to baffle the world with her stunningly gorgeous offspring.
Ahh, that feels better. I think I’m now ready to face a three hour layover with my kids tomorrow. (Maybe.)