Aw, BENNY BOY. You really know how to appeal to your fan base, don’t you?! In what seems like, and probably is, a harmless interview with Details Magazine, Ben Affleck spoke about his ineptitude as a father figure to his three impossibly-adorable children with Jennifer Garner.
Before I skewer him, however, it should be noted that the interview was related to WORK–specifically his latest awesome-looking film, Argo–and so the poor bastard was probably just lamenting about how work distracts him from where he’d prefer to be. BUT! DUDE! HIRE A PUBLICIST!
Because when a journalist asks you about how well you balance work with the rest of your life, there’s a better way to answer than this:
“I am not very present in the rest of my life. My wife’s very patient. She does everything. If I have time, I try to spend time with the kids, even if just to be a physical presence, the bath, whatever. But my mind’s always going, ‘How are we going to light that shot tomorrow? What’s the master shot for that scene? Is there even going to be a master?’ Just ruminating endlessly.”
OOF, dude. OOF. There’s something so dismissive and off-putting about how he brushes off his mental and emotional absenteeism. I’m not the only one feeling that, right?
He followed this up with the type of joke many of us parents make, but also don’t print in magazines where it is HARD TO DISCERN LEVELS OF HUMOR:
‘Anytime you think, “I’m wasting my time here,” the first thought you have is, “I could go home and be with my kids.” But he joked it is not long before the pace of looking after his brood makes him change his mind. He said: ‘Now, you may go home and be with your kids and very quickly start thinking, “I wonder what’s on the work front?” Because running around after three kids is very tiring.’
Hell yeah, it is, Benjamin! WHICH IS WHY YOU LET THE WIFE DEAL WITH IT, AMIRITE?! UP TOP! LOLLER!
Besides, MAKIN’ the babies is the fun part, YANNO?!
Ugh.
(I’m kidding.)
(Mostly.)
About Kristine Cook
