Has there ever been a season better named than fall? Mornings, and an open window: you wake to a slight cold breath on your shoulder, a lover’s ghost named Autumn breathing softly, reminding you that things end, yes, but before they do they wither and fade. The sun hangs lower in the evening, wispy clouds caress the harvest moon at night, time runs like an ice-choked river, the memories of long bright days settle in your bones, and you hope they’re enough to provide warmth through the months ahead.
Sucks, right? Well, forget all of that bullshit! The Entourage movie script is almost finished!
Fans of the show were probably sad when Vinnie, Ari, Turtle, Drama and E literally flew off into the sunset in the series, because the sun is really hot and their plane probably caught fire. *does bong rip, shotguns can of Bud Lite, high-fives bros*
But soon after the show ended, creator Doug Ellin and producer Marky “Mark Wahlberg” Mark promised that Vinnie, Ari, Turtle, Drama and E would return in some form, perhaps as a graphic novel co-written by Watchmen creator Alan Moore, or an epic poem co-authored by noted poet, Nobel Prize winner and Beowulf scholar Seamus Heaney, or possibly even a hastily shot cash-grab of a movie. The first two options didn’t pan out, so between rounds of playing Modern Warfare 3 with his friends (“worshipping at the altar of MW3 with Broseph of Aramathea”, as Ellin puts it) and getting high and watching Stepbrothers (“Fucking Catalina Wine Mixer Night, StepBROthers!”) Ellin began working on a script. A week later, Ellin emailed Nikki Finke and told her that he’s almost done. Here is that annotated email, which we obtained through shady means:
“Hey Niki (sic) remember wen (sic) I told U about the
Enturage Onteraj Amistad Armitagescrip (sic) Im (sic) righting (sic) well Im (sic) close to done with it, just have to add some titty seens (sic) and maybe a car chase because people luv (sic) that seeing Michal (sic) Bay kind of shit in movies.”
Keep in mind that the film has not been greenlit. So talk of an Entourage movie may be a bit premature. While Entourage was a pretty popular show, it didn’t have Sex and The City’s numbers, pop cultural impact, or fanatically loyal fanbase. And there really weren’t a whole lot of questions that Entourage left unanswered. Except maybe “why was Debi Mazar listed in the opening credits when she only appeared in half of the episodes, for a grand total of 20 whole minutes?”