If you were snug as a bug in a rug under your social media rock yesterday, you’ll have missed two very important pieces of internet culture news: Facebook passed the 1 billion monthly active users milestone (you know, the one that everyone reaches) and they launched their first ever ad campaign for the social network.
Uh, yep. You read that right. The largest time suck website of the 21st century eclipsed the general standard of active website traffic and subsequently released an ad in an effort to generate more traffic to their website. Or not. I cannot be considered an authority on why in the world Zuckerface would have decided that a commercial was The Next Big Step for his alien love baby, but I can dissect the shit out of it because IT IS MOTHERFUCKING RIDICULOUS!
Chairs. Bridges. Airplanes. Doorbells. Basketball. Dance Floors. Great Nations. Toothpicks. Epilators. Banana Peels. Oh I’m sorry. It’s easy to get carried away relating every day things with what Facebook is to people who have no idea what the hell Facebook is. It’s totally likely they were trying to do the Google-feel-good approach to the ad, but it’s just so fucking weird.
I can picture a sweet, out-of-touch soul watching his nightly Wheel of Fortune marathon when this bad boy comes on the boob tube. The realm of emotion that dude is going to process in a minute and a half is fascinating. He’ll be like, “Am I supposed to be sitting on top of Facebook? Using it as a stool to hang tall draperies? Is it a doorbell on the wing of an airplane in the middle of the dance floor at a basketball game being played in the vacuous loneliness of the deep, dark universe? Ooh, a lightning bug!”
The onslaught of spoof ads is coming, folks. I can feel it in the depths of my crotch.
What do you think of this gem from the Facebook camp? What vague and erroneous inanimate objects would you have chosen if you were on the creative board for the ad?
















