Did you know that a fourth installment of Jurassic Park was being tossed around in 2007? I didn’t. But a Redditor has found some of the concept art from when it was in the early stages of consideration. It’s, uh, a little disturbing.
HHHHHHHIIIIIIIIIIHAVE YOU ACCEPTED JESUS CHRIST AS YOUR SAVIOR?
If you’re thinking that looks like some kind of freaky human dinosaur hybrid, then you’re onto the plot of the defunct movie. And if you’re Beavis, like me, you think, “Oh, man, someone has been boning the dinosaurs. Boom chicka bow wow! Raptor loooovvvvee, baby. Gonna figure out how to open this door with my claw and then we can freak all night. Who’s extinct? Not me. Now, don’t be still like that, baby, you know I can’t see you when you do that. Move around a little so Rexy can be sexy.”
Or maybe you’re not like me and are now extremely disturbed by my dinosaur dirty talk.
Anyway, the dinosaurs were not, in fact, making eggs with Jeff Goldblum. The proposed plot was that someone retrieves the shaving cream can full of eggs that Newman dropped during the first movie. But then the person who retrieves them is kidnapped by some evil company who has this really great idea: cross-breed dinosaurs and humans because what could ever go wrong there? Vivisection has a great track record.
Er, wait, no.
Alas, it never came to be. And hotties like this guy shall remain packed away in one of those huge storage rooms like in Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark unless someone comes to rescue the abandoned plot and make it into a movie.
Derp.
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