Adam Levine Looses Expletive-Laden Mouth Splooge Right Onto ‘Honey Boo Boo’

12/04/2012 1:00 pm by

Oooooooh, you guys. I love a good celebrity rant and EVEN BETTER when celebrities take other pop culture phenomenons into the crosshairs. That’s like a brownie on top of an ice cream cone made of potty words with sprinkles, clap clap clap my hands and put it into my mouth. I’m like a little sea lion here, begging for treats. Put a hat on me! Bark, bark bark!

Maroon 5 frontman / The Voice judge / guy from *fans self* hot American Horror Story cameo Adam Levine let loose an impressive stream of word vomit in an interview with GQ that would make my Grandmother slap him upside the head– all in the name of Here Comes Honey Boo Boo, hallowed be thy name:

Screen shot 2012 12 04 at 10.00.43 AM 590x338 Adam Levine Looses Expletive Laden Mouth Splooge Right Onto Honey Boo Boo

“Seriously, Honey Boo Boo is the decay of Western civilization. Just because so many people watch the show doesn’t mean it’s good. So many people witness atrocities and can’t take their eyes away from them, but that doesn’t mean they’re good. That show is literally The. Worst. Thing. That’s. Ever. Happened. It’s complete f-cking ignorance and the most despicable way to treat your kids. F-ck those people. You can put that in the magazine: F-ck those idiots. They’re just the worst. Sorry, I’m so sensitive to that — like, I don’t know, man, it’s upsetting. Just to clarify, I said, ‘F-ck those people!’”

Well. Okay. That’s pretty much self explanatory. Okay. Great.

A few brief thoughts:

1. Who HASN’T thought these things about Honey Boo Boo at one point? I have thought these things about Honey Boo Boo while watching Honey Boo Boo. Also while turning off Honey Boo Boo and worrying about her future and the future of all our children, and while absolutely not reenacting scenes from Honey Boo Boo while drunk. It’s familiar, is all I’m saying. From my brain to his mouth. There might be a tube connecting us.

tumblr m8hxhrs7Oa1ql5yr7o1 400 Adam Levine Looses Expletive Laden Mouth Splooge Right Onto Honey Boo Boo

2. While no one seems to be arguing that Honey Boo Boo is premium educational programming (I’m sure if we looked hard enough we could find a dark corner of the internet that believes that but please, let’s not go to that place), I would also argue that music-related-voting-contest-shows are the “decay of Western civilization.” Touché, Adam Levine.

3. High five.

4. Ooops, no wait, another high five.

5. American Horror Story?

adamy levine meets bloody face for american horror story ryan murphy ggnoads 590x440 Adam Levine Looses Expletive Laden Mouth Splooge Right Onto Honey Boo Boo

adam levine american horror story Adam Levine Looses Expletive Laden Mouth Splooge Right Onto Honey Boo Boo

You’re welcome.

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About Jamie Jamerson

Jamie, aka The Grumbles, cries every day that an update on the cast of My Monkey Baby isn't released. Her tears could fill a river of regret. She blogs at Grumbles and Grunts.

Filed Under: Best Of MamaPop, Celebrities, Celebrity Interviews, Celebrity Smack Talk, Horror, Internet, It's Not Learning, It's The Learning Channel, Pop Culture, Popular, Teh Funneh, Temper Tantrum, Things That Are Awesome Tagged With: , ,


From Our Partners

  • Danielletodd

    I think I might be the only person on the planet that does not find this man attractive. I also find his singing voice akin to fingernails on a chalkboard. However, I could not agree with him more.

    • http://www.facebook.com/traceygaughranperez Tracey Gaughran-Perez

      But Danielle, he has The Moves Like Jagger! THEY WILL NOT BE DENIED! *snort*

      • DianaCLT

        THAT song ^ is the one thing I cannot stand about him.

    • http://twitter.com/thegrumbles the grumbles

      I think we can come together and agree that he does not need to talk or sing.

      • http://www.facebook.com/traceygaughranperez Tracey Gaughran-Perez

        Err, I actually like Maroon Five. So, umm, no on the coming together.

        • http://twitter.com/thegrumbles the grumbles

          WHY DON’T YOU JUST PUT THAT IN YOUR POCKETS, THEN? HUH?

          • http://www.facebook.com/traceygaughranperez Tracey Gaughran-Perez

            GODDAMN RIGHT I WILL. WHEN I CAN FIND THEM. MOAR POCKETTTTSSS!1!!!

          • DianaCLT

            Another plus about Adam Levine? He’s rather compact. Ripped, but not bulky. Pocket-sized. (Or “box”-sized? *Fans self*)

        • DianaCLT

          I love him. I love Maroon 5. I love the kindness and respect with which he speaks to the contestants on The Voice. I love that he speaks the truth about shit-turd programming like Honey Boo Boo. I could not agree with him more.

          Also? I love that he makes me feel dirty, in the best possible way.

          • http://www.facebook.com/traceygaughranperez Tracey Gaughran-Perez

            THIS, GRUMBLES. THIS. ;)

      • http://twitter.com/sarahesinfield Sarah

        Talking and/or singing not required.

    • http://twitter.com/ryenerman ryenerman

      Nope, I am in total agreement on all points. If my 9 YO makes me listen to Payphone one more time, I’m going to throw away every portable music device in the house.

  • http://twitter.com/jennamariebee Mrs. Jenna

    Oh god. That last picture. I had to explain to the husband the other night why I don’t hate him with all of my heart anymore. When he asked why, I just said “He licked his fingers in American Horror Story.”

    I feel like I need some alone time with that picture. Excuse me.

    • DianaCLT

      Um. How is it that nobody’s said the obvious?

      Finger. Lickin’. Gooooooood.

  • TMcGree

    You WISH you had a tube connecting you to Adam Levine. Yep, I’m 12.

    • DianaCLT

      I wish Adam Levine’s tube was connecting to me.

      *Ahem* What? I’m sorry, what were you saying?

  • http://twitter.com/notsuperjustmom Miranda

    Now I NEED to watch American Horror Story. Need.

    • http://www.facebook.com/traceygaughranperez Tracey Gaughran-Perez

      You so do. So. Do.

      • DianaCLT

        Me, too! Have never seen. Anyone know which specific episodes he’s in? Titles and/or episode numbers, people! I NEED THEM!

        • http://twitter.com/jennamariebee Mrs. Jenna

          The first one of this season will do.

          • DianaCLT

            Thanks! But…he’s only in one?? Damnit!

          • http://www.facebook.com/traceygaughranperez Tracey Gaughran-Perez

            No, he’s in more than one… OH YOU’LL SEE! :D

          • DianaCLT

            Damn On Demand! Damnitalltohell!!! The only episodes available are 4, 5, & 6!

            However. YouTube offers that particular scene for viewing. Um. Is it possible to put the finger-licking on slo-mo?

  • KellyBDelaney

    “I would also argue that music-related-voting-contest-shows are the “decay of Western civilization.” Touché, Adam Levine.”
    HOOOO!
    I also think Honey Boo Boo is too easy a target. And I actually don’t find the people in the show so abhorrent. When I’ve watched it, I’ve deduced that yeah they’re kind of gross, but they all love each other and want the best for Honey Boo Boo. And, yeah, I guess I’m getting soft in my old age because if there’s love and they’re good to each other then that’s all I really care about.

    • Tasterspoon

      Agree on all points. I’ve watched only about 10 min of one Honey Boo Boo show and it involved bobbing for pigs’ feet (gross) and the mom forbidding her kids, despite their pleas, to jump in some swimming hole that had a big sign warning of flesh eating bacteria or toxic waste or something. I gave her props for having *some* standards (there were other people actually swimming).

      However if, by “most despicable way to treat your kids,” he means whoring them out to popular ridicule via reality television, he may have a point, but maybe there was a financial calculus.

    • http://twitter.com/thegrumbles the grumbles

      I don’t think you’re wrong. I agree that I’ve watched the show and besides it being ridiculously stupid, they aren’t really terrible people or anything. None of them are going to murder anyone, except they probably let their kids throw food at pizza restaurants once or twice and we all know that leads to murder. MURDER.