It’s the holiday season, guys, and that means that it’s time for lots of overeating, overspending, and (best of all) WARDROBE PLANNING.
Whether you plan for maximum comfort during your overindulgence or you plan for maximum trendsetting during your holiday photoshoot, I have THE ULTIMATE *IT* item for the 2012 holiday season:
I know what you’re thinking (you’re…twelve?), but hear me out. (And most importantly, DON’T FIGHT THE FORCE.) Ahem.
I present to you the following scenarios for which these Star Wars Slippers will simultaneously serve as a practical, eye-catching, and unifying force for you and your family during these upcoming weeks of holiday torture BLISS.
The Holiday Feast
Now, we’ve all just had a dry run of overindulgence on Thanksgiving, and hopefully you’ve used that time to your advantage. For example how much does your girth increase when you consume three times the amount of the daily recommended protein intake? How is that affected when there is eggnog involved? And let’s not forget about pie. (As if.) If you were smart, you wore yoga pants with a long sweater and no one was the wiser.
But think, for a moment, about your feet. I’m guessing those trendy tall boots and sweater socks weren’t feeling so cute at about 7 in the PM, were they? Did they allow for the swelling that occurred once you stuffed yourself so full of mashed potatoes and green bean casserole? You don’t have to answer that question, because we already know the answer. And now, there’s a solution:
Now, working the slipper angle for your company party, red carpet event, or even the neighborhood Ugly Sweater bash might seem a bit trickier, but not if you follow these basic guidelines. (Why, yes, I HAVE put a lot of thought into this.)
The Formal Holiday Party
Attending a formal event? No problem. Adding some slippers to your outfit plan is only going to make you more memorable, and not in a Lindsay Lohan kinda way. Just be sure to show the rest of the party just how seriously you can cut a rug at the eleventh hour of the gala while they sit and nurse some aching bunions.
The Informal Office Party
Pssht. This one’s a no-brainer. If the goal of an office party is to embarrass yourself so badly that it outlives your actual CAREER, then how can SLIPPERS not help this equation?! Place pairs in some strategic locations (on the photocopier where the inevitable butt copies will occur, by the big wastebasket where the inevitable spewing will happen) and your co-workers will help to deflect some of your more questionable behavior. Remember, there’s no “I” in “Drunk Team.”
The Holiday Photo Shoot
Maybe you’re blissfully unaware of this fact, but there is a passive aggressive cesspool that compiles itself in your basket of holiday cards every year, and it begins right around, oh, NOW. There’s the couple that you met on your honeymoon that always send a picture of their orthodontically-blessed gaggle of children huddled around one of the seven wonders of the world. And then there’s that neighbor that somehow gets her newborn AND puppy to smile for the camera. And let’s not forget about Uncle JimBob who likes to show off his latest, uhm, arm-candy collection with a backdrop of the Caribbean or a new Maserati.
YEAH, YOU KNOW THE ONES.
That’s why this year, you’re going to stick it to the holiday-card-proverbial-man and you’re gonna do it in sweet, Star Wars comfort. If slippers aren’t the holiday photo trump card, THEN I DON’T KNOW WHAT IS.
The Holiday Hangover/Food Coma
People, please. If I have to explain this one, you haven’t been paying attention. And if you’re not yet convinced, then you obviously haven’t tried on a slipper to have Yoda’s disapproving face starting back at you.
In summation: I’ll see you at the Sears slipper aisle. And you’re welcome.
Thanks to Sears for sponsoring this post. Browse their awesome selection of Star Wars slippers here!
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