‘The Hunger Games’ Just. Got. Real.


hunger games katniss 590x332 The Hunger Games Just. Got. Real.

Lots of networks, businesses, publishers, and ambitious panhandlers have been hard a work trying to puzzle out the best way to cash in on the success of The Hunger Games this year, prompting an alarming uptick in plastic pink archery sets and cute little jumpers with bird pins on them, because every parent wants their child to look just as poor and filthy as they will on the day they might be chosen to die for our amusement.

The Hunger Games phenomenon is still hot hot hot! with disposable-income-dropping young people. Scheming entrepreneurs have eagerly skipped right through the puddles of blood because THOSE DOLLA DOLLA BILLS, Y’ALL, they aren’t going to leap off the platform and snatch themselves out of the cornucopia.

hunger games merch The Hunger Games Just. Got. Real.

Hey, a little merchandising never hurt anyone, right? Have you seen my soul around here anywhere?

But, beyond Post-Apocalyptic Coal-Mine Barbie and a glut of very obviously plagiarized heroines leaping around in the woods, nobody has had balls big enough to take the next “logical” step towards society’s demise: actually recreating the scenario of the Games as part of a reality TV gimmick with real human beings. Nobody, right? Because that would be crazy and an indication that the lessons in the book had gone right over our heads, right? Mmmhmm. Nobody.

Hey! On a completely unrelated note yesterday the CW Network announced two new reality series in the works for their upcoming schedule, including one standard match-the-genitals dating show and one “intense” reality experience where pairs must survive the elements while hunting down the other contestant teams in a series of traps and running for their lives from genetically engineered dogs– wait. You guys. I don’t want to be rash but this is sounding kind of familiar.

THE HUNT is an intense wilderness competition taking place over one month, as 12 teams of two are provided no food, water, or shelter, but must compete in a game where they’ll rely on their physicality, survival skills, and hunting skills to endure their conditions, capture one another, and ultimately win a huge cash prize.

the hunger games 590x392 The Hunger Games Just. Got. Real.

“I… uh….”

So here’s what I’ve got:

1.  The Hunger Games explores the ruinous effects of a culture which views “reality violence” as entertainment.

2.  Everyone loves The Hunger Games! Reading party!

3.  Actual network attempts to capitalize on its success by creating a reality show based on a reality show meant to teach us about how destructive reality shows are.

4.  Climb under your desk and wait for the end of days.

Now, of course, for legal purposes I’m sure The Hunt will have “absolutely nothing” to do with The Hunger Games books/movies and they’ve mentioned nothing above about the contestants being kids. These poor saps exciting heroes will most likely be of consenting age and – prepare yourselves – no one will actually DIE. This isn’t exactly HBO either, so their options to up the drama and keep people engaged will have to run more along the lines of Survivor than Oz.

These major caveats present the producers with two possible scenarios: Either it will be a weak, half-strength version of The Hunger Games, counting on viewers sticking-around based on premise loyalty alone, OR – they’ll be forced to make significant enough changes that things will get interesting, though since we’re on season 21,03875759 of Survivor WHAT NEW THINGS COULD THEY POSSIBLY SHOW US BESIDES REAL MURDER?

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About Jamie Jamerson

Jamie, aka The Grumbles, cries every day that an update on the cast of My Monkey Baby isn't released. Her tears could fill a river of regret. She blogs at Grumbles and Grunts.



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  • sickerthnothers

    I am so grossed out.

    • the grumbles

      I think you mean “entertained.” BARF.

  • http://twitter.com/babyrabies Jill Krause

    I’m a sad product of pop culture and am admittedly intrigued by this show. Also, I think we get the CW as one of our 10 free channels not in Spanish. So yay!

    • the grumbles

      I always want to knock CW but they’re responsible for two of my biggest guilty pleasures so I really can’t razz them too much.

  • Beth Anne

    hide your kids, hide your wife JUST. GOT. REAL.

  • Alena

    I can’t even process how this could be any different than any of the other “live off the land and your skills” shows. But…you know…I WILL PROBABLY STILL WATCH IT.

    • the grumbles

      Remember the very first Survivor?! it was actually a unique concept then, and totally interesting. 42 years ago.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=658965091 Jen Schoeph

    this makes me sick. let’s willingly go into the woods & see if we survive? it takes crazy to create crazy and crazy will come to audition. you will find me happily watching re-runs of press you luck on the game show network…

    • the grumbles

      that’s an even scarier thought. what kind of people would audition for this?!

  • http://profiles.google.com/kemi.like.chemistry Kemi Sutton

    This has nothing to do with the new show (most definitely won’t be watching), but in that first photo, it looks like Katniss lost an arm. :)

  • SuzyQuzey

    But, will there be nudity? I have my priorities.

  • Tyskkvinna

    I am sure my ancestors from way back are thrilled that they suffered so much, worked so hard and gave up so many things so that this can exist.

  • http://www.facebook.com/aspera.eponym Aspera Eponym

    Or it could be written with a character who actually stands up for something and decides rather than one who tries to support the status quo, but for reasons that aren’t really her fault she screws up every attempt and ends up starting the revolution accidentally… Whoops!

  • ARC

    I believe this is how First ever Hunger Games started……. some hurting there, some “accidental” killing here. Let the Games begin!
    Although, I do think this is a HORRIBLE idea, I am actually kind of intrigued by it.