Sometimes — just sometimes — the universe smiles upon our miserable, meaningless existence and gives us everything we never even knew we wanted.
Kathy Bates in American Horror Story.
That’s right. Oscar winner Kathy Bates going head-to-head, toe-to-toe with Oscar winner Jessica Lange in American Horror Story, as “friends-turned-enemies,” most likely as witches, in a role that creator Ryan Murphy is describing as “a bad, bad woman” and “five times worse than her Misery character.”
This post is taking me a ridiculously long time to write because I keep blacking out from excitement.
It just makes so much damn sense, I’m ashamed that it never occurred to me before. I mean, MY GOD, KATHY BATES. Misery. Delores Claiborne. I should’ve started a Betty-White-on-SNL-style Facebook page for it and been campaigning all over the place to make it happen. But it’s happening, and I could not be more excited.
(Although I am still also voting for Fairuza Balk as a coven member or maybe just a cashier at the Ye Olde Local Shoppe of Witchcraft and Witchery who sells beeswax candles and eye of newt to Lange and Bates. Right? RIGHT? I should totally write for AHS. Or at least some fanfiction.)
Murphy revealed that Bates’ “mouth was drop-jawed” because what he was pitching to her was based on a true event. Of course, no further details on that were mentioned, but he describes it as “some good stuff.” Bates is apparently a fan of the show, and from the sound of it, she didn’t need much time to decide that this role was for her.
The second season of American Horror Story got some blowback about the sexualized violence and some of the other trials and tribulations it put its female characters through (although hi, welcome to the horror genre in general, guys). But you’ve gotta admit that the show is giving some excellent damn work to some excellent actresses. Along with Jessica and Kathy, Sarah Paulson and season one’s Taissa Farmiga are also returning. (No word on the amazing Lily Rabe, alas. At least not yet.) (UPDATE: As reader Heather points out in the comments, Lily Rabe signed on a couple weeks ago, all behind my back and stealthy-like. [J/K I just missed the story on EW.com.] WHEE YAY OMG ELEVENTY.)
Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go run some errands and pick up some groceries.