About Jive Turkey

Jive Turkey lives in Pittsburgh and spends her time desperately clinging to the hope that someday the cast of Deadwood will destroy the cast of Glee.

Teen Mom 2′s Jenelle Evans Finally Does The Sensible Thing And MARRIES AN EX-CON


jenelle

Internet, I have tried (and failed) and tried (and failed) and tried (and failed), but I just can’t stop caring about those girls from Teen Mom. I have been ridiculously over-invested in their lives from the beginning, which is why I am here to ONCE AGAIN tell you about something boneheaded one of them did. [...]

Former Sitcom Character Actor Jenna Von Oy Provides Groundbreaking Parenting Advice


Jenna-von-Oy-photo

NEW PARENTS! You can finally rest easy (although not literally because — HA! — you’re not getting any sleep, homes): Six from Blossom is here to give you parenting advice! Because she’s been a parent for six whole months and knows just about everything about everything! Need some tips in posing awkwardly in front of [...]

Kirstie Alley Claims That She And Patrick Swayze Had An ‘Emotional Affair’


Kirstie Alley in North and South

I have always considered Kirstie Alley to be the harmless sort of Crazy Celebrity, but her most recent attempt to stay relevant sure got my dander up. MY DANDER IS UP, MS. ALLEY. I SUGGEST YOU CONSIDER YOUR NEXT MOVE CAREFULLY. …although considering your moves carefully doesn’t seem to be your strong suit. During a [...]

Already Cooler Than You: Kelsey Grammer’s Infant Parties At The Playboy Mansion


Kewpie Doll

Sorry, guys, but you knew this would happen: proof that something that sprang from Kelsey Grammer is cooler than you. Tossed salad and blows to my pride. Kelsey Grammer’s three-month-old daughter, Faith, accompanied him and his wife Kayte to the Playboy Mansion for a Halloween party last Saturday evening, where the infant was likely exposed [...]

Jessica Biel Takes Justin Timberlake’s Name, Probably Shouldn’t Take His Friends


Jessica Biel

Today in news that isn’t our business and doesn’t affect our lives whatsoever but still somehow fascinates us, Jessica Biel will be taking Justin Timberlake‘s last name. Yep, that’s right: whenever that inevitable 7th Heaven reunion special is filmed, look for Jess to appear in the credits as JESSICA TIMBERLAKE, OOH LA LA. Oh, you [...]