MamaPop™

American Idol: Girls Revenge Open Thread

American Idol sistahs gonna work it out. And open thread betches gonna DRINK TO THAT. Whatever THAT is.

Reminder: American Idol: Girls Revenge Open Thread Tonight!

Yes! It would seem my will is much stronger than I'd previously thought, as last night's evening of AI proved miraculously entertaining (or was it the booze? Does it matter?)! The guys, overall, did not wholly suck, and I'm fairly confident that -- given last week's track -- the girls as set to suck even less tonight.

Less sucking? Its a good thing.

So be here tonight to share in the fun with all the AI open thread betches, starting at 8pm EST. And yes, I am fully aware that the ANTM premiere runs during this same time slot, but 1) I can absolutely guarantee you will have more fun watching AI live with us, and 2) this is what TiVo/VCRs were made for, man. Nuff said.

See ya'll later tonight!

Hair Drama

So, I realize I may be in the minority among the other members of the Mamapop Dream Team, but I don't really watch all that much reality TV. I just started watching this season's American Idol (if for no other reason than to participate in the awesome open threads here), and even that is a program I watch when nothing else is on. The only reality show I make a point to tune in to is Project Runway, because even though the show will inevitably get all dramatic and "Hey, look at me! I'm a difficult personality, so I DESERVE to be a certain kind of celebrity, because 'can't get along with others' equals 'ambiguously talented' in Reality TV-World" after a while, it at least remains a quasi-legitimate competition throughout. Though, as we all know, the competition is inconsistently judged by bitchy queens who tend to apply bronzer with frightening gusto:

"Pumpkin is the new black. It's fabulous. Very fashion forward."

Submitted For Your Approval/Disapproval

What exactly is going on with Courtney Love's breasts here (to say nothing of her dubious fashion choices)?

The AP has announced it will no longer cover Paris Hilton. Humanity rejoyces.

Here's a wee bit of fodder for your future nightmares. [shudder]

Madonna doesn't want daughter Lourdes wearing tight pants. Guess this is sort of a classic do-as-i-say-not-as-i-do sort of thing, eh?

America's Next Top Model returns with a glorious two-hour premiere TONIGHT! Fire up your TiVos, people!

/random

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APPROPRIATELY RANDOM EDIT: For those of you that didn't follow our Oscar Night post (where this was announced), the winnah of the Oscars Challenge was none other than Ann Coleman! Congrats, Ann! Her picks were absurdly prescient -- leading to discussion that perhaps she'd time-traveled to the future and thereby seen our Oscars future... In any case, props to her and thanks to everyone who participated!

American Idol: Dudes Revenge Open Thread

Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to drink enough that these guys actually sound GOOD (try not to blackout out, please).

Am I the only one who will miss this?

Although it hasn't yet been cancelled, Studio 60 has been indefinitely replaced in NBC's Monday night line-up with The Black Donnellys. The show had become a vehicle for Aaron Sorkin to vent his hate and frustration with everything from bloggers to reality TV to women who are not as smart as he is. (And maybe that is why things went wrong for Studio 60 -- it had become just a little too personal, too autobiographical, too obviously Sorkin's issues being played out on TV.) But in spite of all its flaws, I came back to watch it week after week.

Reminder: American Idol Does Not Suck Open Thread Tonight!

Yeah, I'm sort of willing that to become reality at this point, but so what? Siriously and for reals, does AI not deserve another chance? Okay, so the dudes sucked butt plugs last week, and the girls on-average were a little more than moderately disappointing, but I for one refuse to give up hope! Besides, what better excuse do I have to drink on a weeknight? Can I get a witness?

So to all my AI betches I say: BE HERE TONIGHT, 8PM EST. DO NOT BE FAINT OF HEART. Let's give it another go this week, keep our spirits high, and pray for some ridiculous drunken Paula hijinks. C'mon! At minimum there's booze and interweb camaraderie in the offing, right?

Britney Spears Is Not That Innocent

Anyone else tired of the bald Britney pictures? Yeah, me too.

Where there's hair, there's hope.

So much craziness y'all. So little Tylenol.

Reportedly, the staffers at the Malibu treatment center, Promises, found a "death list" written by Britney of people she wants dead, K-Fed and the paparazzi among them. They also claim that Britney has become "increasingly paranoid" and repeatedly searches her room for "bugs that are recording her thoughts". As a result, she has now been placed on suicide watch and there is a bed reserved for her at the local psychiatric ward.

Everyday is Caturday!

I missed it this weekend, but that doesn't mean its too late to enjoy the spoils of I CAN HAS CHEEEZBURGER?

And I'm sorry but no, this is never going to stop being funny to me.

Being Bobby Brown

It seems Bobby Brown's been nabbed again.

For the second time in a year, Bobby Brown has been arrested while in town to watch his daughter at a cheerleading competition. Brown was picked up at Attleboro High School on Sunday night on a warrant for failing to appear at a child support hearing in October....In October, Brown paid $11,000 in delinquent child support after being threatened with arrest if he stepped back into Massachusetts.....Last March, Brown was nabbed for minor motor vehicle violations dating back 14 years when he arrived to watch his daughter at a cheering competition at Bartlett High School.

Dannielynn at Eighteen

Forensic artists and facial recognition experts have weighed in on Dannielynn's paternity and they say say Larry Birkhead is her biological father. I know...not a huge surprise. I think most everyone believes he's the real daddy anyway.

But what IS amazing is the age-progression they did to 5 month old Dannielynn's photo to show what she would most likely look like at age 18. Look at the various photos of Larry Birkhead and Howard K. Stern in the post below this (there are more after the jump) and compare them to this picture of Dannielynn, age-progressed by forensic artiststs. I think it's safe to say that she doesn't favor Stern at all.

The second place winner of most likely paternal parentage? The late J. Howard Marshall. Ewww!

You can read the details about the age-progression here.

Who's Your Daddy?

A few days ago I saw the story about Angelina and Brad adopting again, but then I forgot to report it. And then guess what happened today? This story saying they're not adopting after all. See? How my not reporting it actually reported it? I am awesome.

Anyway, on to babies' daddies.

The custody hearing regarding Anna Nicole Smith's five-month-old daughter, Dannielynn, took place today in Nassau, Bahamas and yielded no results. The judge has scheduled the next hearing for mid-March to determine whether the DNA taken from Anna Nicole's body will be used to determine the paternity of the baby as requested by Larry Birkhead. The baby will stay in Howard K. Stern's custody until that time. At last count, FIVE men were claiming they may be the father.

For the sake of discussion, let's just consider the two men who are most likely to be the baby's daddy. Because anything over two is going to start making me queasy.

Look at the pictures after the jump and tell me what you think...

Rainn Wilson on SNL

So, did you all catch Rainn Wilson on SNL on Saturday? Yeah? Well, LUCKY YOU.

I was all jazzed for his appearance on the show, had been looking forward to it all week, and then? I went to dinner with my husband on Saturday night and thought to myself, "Hey, even though you've only had two sugar-free Jello puddings to eat all day today, you can totally order one pomegranate martini before dinner and be fine." Stupid girl.

You Airbrushed My Heart

Page Six is reporting that Hugh Hefner plans to marry head girlfriend Holly Madison by the end of this year.

Not sure how this will work considering he's still technically married to his second wife, but since Hef has been dropping hints lately about giving Holly the bayyyyyybeeeeeeeee she so desperately waaaaaaannnnts, I'm guessing this gossip has a pretty good chance at being true.

I'd get into the whole "OMG HE OLD" thing, except...you know what? Hef is going to outlive us all. So...good for him. Seriously. Holly's gorgeous and hopefully their baby will inherit her stunning and natural good looks.

ZING!

(Photos from Bricks and Stones)

Cast Your Ballots Again! (Sort of!)

Last week Tracey posed the question, "Why am I still watching these stupid shows?" I've been wondering this myself for a while so when commenter Amy H. explained that the previews compel us to watch for fear of missing something really important next time, I felt I'd finally received a satisfactory explanation.

However, over the weekend as I trolled through my never-ending TiVo cache of horrible reality TV (e.g Bad Girls' Club, My Super Sweet Sixteen, The Real World, Denver, etc.) it occured to me that I despise almost everyone on each of these shows. And I realized that watching programs about people I find loathesome is just the outlet I need to keep me from punching my neighbor in the neck for never once mowing his lawn. (I mean, had I not been so involved with hating Dilana on Rockstar Supernova this past summer, who knows what sort of revenge I may have exacted? Those weeds were five feet tall!)

So, here's my question - who keeps you in front of the TV and, ostensibly, out of jail? Are you praying a tragic peroxide incident ends Team Blonde's run on The Amazing Race? Still steaming over Yaya and the umeboshi on ANTM? And what about that contemptible shit-stabber Shane of The Real Housewives? Or do you save your ire for fictional characters like Meredith Grey and Lorelai Gilmore? C'mon everyone - share the hate.

Oscar's New Show

Nope, not that Oscar.
Oscar Nunez, who plays Oscar on The Office, has a new show premiering on Comedy Central next month.

What is it about Comedy Central that attracts Office cast members? Hmm...

Liveblogging The 2007 Oscars

* A continually updated, running commentary on the broadcast in real-time (hit refresh as necessary)*

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The night has come. Hold onto your sombreros, folks.

And for the record: I watched both The Departed AND Babel today, so needless to say I'M PUMPED!

BTW, the voting for our Oscars Challenge has been closed since 5pm today, so to those of you who tried to slip a ballot in after that I can only say: YOU SNOOZE YOU LOSE, MAN!

8:00: Oh, I guess the telecast doesn't actually begin until 8:30 (?). Ah well, its never to early to start drinkin'

8:04: Nicole Kidman needs to eat a freakin' sammich

8:06: Who is the black Liberace dude?

8:07: YAY STEVE CARRELL!

8:10: What year was it that dogs became fashion accessories, exactly?