Ice-T Takes It Sweet and Low

I can't decide what bewitches me more about this photo. Is it the way Ice-T's wife, Coco, looks just like a propped-up cut-out of Anna Nicole Smith back in the livin'-breathin'-and-birthin'-babies days? Or is it the what-the-fuck? gesture T's making with his hands, like, Can you BELIEVE that I, as a sexually active human being, am inspired by and would go so far as to encourage other men and women to aspire to the dizzying heights of cliched porn-star pin-up bonerdome that I reach every day with the Mrs. here?

I am hypnotized by Mrs. T's magical sprayed-on pants, of course, though I'm afraid that if she's working toward a Daisy Duke-style homage to Marilyn Monroe, who was once famously sewn into a gold lame gown, Lycra Spandex is kind of a cop out. I mean, make the effort, that synthetic shit doesn't breathe. Shoes, hair, bustier -- Coco, your bod is slammin' but once you discover the joys of shopping somewhere other than Frederick's, you'll find that clothes that leave a little bit to the pubic's -- I mean PUBLIC'S imagination -- can be sexy and age-appropriate. So good luck in your career as a marital sex toy, but when it's over I hope your pre-nup covers the cost of some night classes in real estate at UCLA-extension.

Comments

[kdiddy]

oh my god, her vagina is trying to scratch its way free!

[Miss Britt]

Are they standing on a couch?

OMG - they totally have their freaking feet on the furniture!!

[Maxine Dangerous]

I thought that was Scarlett Johansson for a minute.

Note to Ice T: Duuuuuuude. Really?

[Amy]

I am too transfixed by the camel toe to comment coherently.

[Suzy Q]

That photo makes me feel like a gynecological voyeur.

*snork* @ kdiddy

[divrchk]

I, too, am mesmerized by the camel toe!

[mom2tbet]

If we can see that much from the front, i imagine we could see her colon from the back~

[b]

I know the camel toe is hypnotizing, but I think her right (our left) nipple is peaking out. Good heavens woman, go getcha some dignity before it's all gone!

[Nic]

He's all "Yeah, I hit that" and we're all, "Dude, that's like saying you eat food -- not an accomplishment."

[DianaCLT]

I am DYING over here, laughing so loud at the comments!!!!!:

oh my god, her vagina is trying to scratch its way free!

I am too transfixed by the camel toe to comment coherently

That photo makes me feel like a gynecological voyeur.

If we can see that much from the front, i imagine we could see her colon from the back~

Good heavens woman, go getcha some dignity before it's all gone!

He's all "Yeah, I hit that" and we're all, "Dude, that's like saying you eat food -- not an accomplishment."

Regardless of the fact that he is fully up-front about having been an actual pimp in his earlier years. And regardless of the fact that his wife makes Barbie look like a nun...there is still something about this mind that I find SO sexy.

I know...I shouldn't have admitted that.

[DianaCLT]

oops - typo...I meant to say something about this MAN I find so sexy.

Shit - I just admitted to it again. Aaack!

[sweetney]

"cliched porn-star pin-up bonerdome" - snort.

mrs. kennedy = geeeeeenius.

[tracey]

I saw these two walking the streets in South Beach over the summer and they are as horrifying in person as they are in this picture. Yikes.

[Maria]

These comments are killing me with the wit.

Seriously, the camel toe has me crossing my legs in horror/sympathy.