Patricia Heaton Freaks Me Out
The always tasteful TMZ posted these pictures of former Everybody Loves Raymond star Patricia Heaton displaying her apparent lack of a bellybutton.
I'll say up front that I don't much care for Ms. Heaton. I've heard her talk in interviews and came to the conclusion that she takes daily doses of Douchebag KoolAid. But I'm not about to pick on her here. Because honestly, her 50-year-old self looks better than my 29-year-old ass, so I can't really talk smack. And besides, people flipping out and blasting women in Hollywood for having the audacity to age or to have human bodies with human "imperfections" makes me furious.
But this definitely turns me off of tummy tucks. Doesn't that just make you shudder? Can you imagine how weird that would feel?
Also, she has GOT to burn that bathing suit. Bikinis are fine, but those tiny string sides look ridiculous and the gingham/Miami-hotel-comforter print is just god-awful. Plus, if you have D cup boobs, you need a D cup top. Don't make the girls suffer, Patricia.
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I remember...I think in the early 90s...hearing about models having their belly buttons removed. No idea if that was true or an urban legend, but I never saw any photographic evidence of such a thing. Patricia Heaton has been very open about her multiple surgeries and I respect that - at least she's not trying to convince the world that she's aging naturally. But...the missing belly button? That is kinda creepy. Even though the belly button a person has post-tummy tuck is a fake - our tummies just look cuter with the little button. ;)
And yeah - for the $$ she's spent on her surgeries, she should get a more flattering suit. I've got about the same build on top, and there's no way I could pull that off.
Posted by: DianaCLT | March 12, 2008 at 12:27 PM
Eweweweweweweweweweweweweweewewewew.
Posted by: Maxine Dangerous | March 12, 2008 at 12:38 PM
1. omg i love you kelly
2. that's some seriously freaky shit right there. (shudder)
Posted by: sweetney | March 12, 2008 at 12:49 PM
Is that a water droplet or a wee tiny button I see on Patty? In any event, she looks fuh-reaky. I agree: that bikini has got to go.
Also, people who have tummy tucks actually DO have real belly buttons. It is moved up, on its stalk, and re-inserted into proper place through a stab incision. My sister just had this done.
Posted by: Suzy Q | March 12, 2008 at 01:20 PM
I have nothing to say about the alien tummy so much as the term "stab incision" just made me come far too close to wetting my pants in fear.
Posted by: Sils | March 12, 2008 at 01:30 PM
Sils: yeah, totally, as did the phrase "It is moved up, on its stalk"
HORF BELLYBUTTON STALK
Posted by: kdiddy | March 12, 2008 at 01:33 PM
TOTALLY, kdiddy. TOTALLY.
You just made me cry laughing.
Posted by: BaltimoreGal | March 12, 2008 at 01:36 PM
At least she's honest about what it takes to look the way she does. I'm not a fan of her either, but because I don't like any of her work. I don't give a shit if she has a belly button or not, she's not a great actress.
Posted by: b | March 12, 2008 at 01:41 PM
The look on Patricia's face in this photo cracks me up. She looks concerned. Maybe she just dropped her belly button in the sand. You all know how hard it is to find something you dropped on a sandy beach.
Posted by: Victoria | March 12, 2008 at 02:14 PM
Stalk!!!
Posted by: JennyM | March 12, 2008 at 02:26 PM
Yeah, totally creepy, and then some. But what I want to know is this: does no-one in Hollywood wear sunscreen anymore? Looks like she's cooking a burn on that navel-less belly.
Posted by: Her Bad Mother | March 12, 2008 at 03:45 PM
Sorry for the gross-out, guys! I work in a medical-legal profession and none of this stuff ever gets to me. I could have said WAY worse things.
Posted by: Suzy Q | March 12, 2008 at 05:47 PM
I wonder if she knew she was going to lose her bellybutton PRIOR to the tummy tuck. Like, I can't imagine it would be worth it if you knew BEFOREHAND that the trade-off is that you would be forever bellybuttonless.
Posted by: Jen | March 12, 2008 at 07:59 PM
I remember being in a class once where the professor gave us a brain teaser: an archaeologist came upon two perfectly preserved bodies, and he *knew* without doubt that it was Adam and Eve. How did he know? Because they didn't have belly buttons.
Maybe Patricia Heaton just has an Eve-complex?
Posted by: JZMom | March 12, 2008 at 08:08 PM
can't a surgeon give you a "fake" belly button??? i mean, that just looks W.R.O.N.G.
Posted by: kristin | March 12, 2008 at 08:46 PM
Yeah, they can give you a fake belly button. There must be a couple of different ways to do a tummy tuck, because a (already skinny!) friend of mine had one about 6 months ago, and she told me they had to make her a new one. I'm not part of the medical profession, so I'll just take her word for it that she has a faux navel. ;) No idea what they did with my friend's stalk though! Maybe they accidentally sucked it out of her, since there really wasn't a damn thing on her needing tucking or sucking anyway!
Posted by: DianaCLT | March 13, 2008 at 01:01 AM
She has sand in there people.... although I have to say it does look crazy
Posted by: Jen | March 13, 2008 at 10:42 AM
She has sand in there people.... although I have to say it does look crazy
Posted by: Jen | March 13, 2008 at 10:43 AM
I had an Abdominoplasty (tummy-tuck), you have the option, sometimes, to have your navel set back in but they seldom look normal or centered. Your unbilicus is not just external afterall, babies are nourished through them internally.
Posted by: Toni | September 05, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Still looks damn hot to me. Love those Ds !!!
Posted by: John | September 24, 2008 at 10:49 PM
as long as she has an asshole that is fine I would lick the shit out of it...literally!
Posted by: rimmer | September 28, 2008 at 08:22 PM