Amy Winehouse Needs a "Use Your Words" Refresher Course

Amy, sweetie, remember we don't hit.  I know you're feeling angry with your bodyguard, but you have to use your words, not your hands.  Hitting is not nice, and if you do it again, you'll have to have a timeout.

You know, now that my kid is just about officially not a preschooler, I don't get many opportunities anymore to bust out the toddler-specific Mommy Voice at home, and I just realized how nice it is to have mostly retired it.  It's very tiring, constantly finding a nice way to tell someone to stop acting like a complete freakin' lunatic.  I don't like doing it, especially at British pop stars who are nearly as old as I am, but clearly someone must, because no one older than my kid should ever go less than two weeks without hitting somebody.

And so this morning, after reading about Amy Winehouse's battering of her own bodyguard, I have come up with the best idea ever.  I don't know why I didn't think of it before (or perhaps I did and have forgotten!).  This situation is so obviously crying out for Jo Frost.

You guys, come on.  Please, try to tell me you wouldn't watch Supernanny put Amy Winehouse on the naughty step for hitting people.  And - OMG, the brilliant ideas just don't stop this morning - if she needed backup, she could call in Dr. Drew.  They could have a group house!  They could fill it with celebrity fuckups!  They could make a chore wheel for the Jezebels!

Please, reality show gods, I BEG OF YOU, provide for me, your most loyal subject, what I need: a Frost-Pinsky mashup of epic proportions.  (And if you wanted to bring MC Serch in somehow, I would go to church every Sunday, I swear.)