Betsy Ross Bump Watch!
Ye olde tongues and wooden teeth are wagging in Philadelphia this morn, as our newly established freedom of the press has allowed the papers to finally print the question we've all been secretly pondering. Why IS Betsy Ross always hiding her stomach behind that grand olde flag?

The comely lady, once again obscuring her womb from the painter's prying brushes.
Ross with an unidentified male companion, shockingly close to canoodling distance.

"Her boobs don't look pregnant," says one source, though his breath was rank with distilled spirits and his wig haphazardly powdered.

Tis suspicious, we say! Apologies, Betsy, but Bump Watch 1776 has officially begun!
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Nicely done! Hilarious. :)
Posted by: magpie | July 04, 2008 at 02:29 PM
Hilarious! I love it :)
Posted by: Kate | July 04, 2008 at 05:20 PM
Okay, this is cracking me the hell up. Bravo!
Posted by: Jenny | July 04, 2008 at 05:55 PM
Pure genius!
Posted by: Kyla | July 04, 2008 at 06:42 PM
AH ha ha ha! LOVE this! :)
Posted by: Liana | July 04, 2008 at 10:26 PM
she is a trollop. verily.
Posted by: kdiddy | July 05, 2008 at 12:29 AM
This is extra timely since Betsy Ross and Ben Franklin (well, the city's official re-enacters) just got married yesterday (July 3)!
Was it a shot gun wedding?!
Posted by: A Wendy in Philly | July 05, 2008 at 02:48 AM
What hast thou under thy skirt, Betsy? Speaketh up!
Posted by: Suzy Q | July 05, 2008 at 11:50 AM
I meant to comment on hilarious this was the other day. I'll be anticipating her upcoming denial of the pregnancy.
Posted by: Shamelessly Sassy | July 07, 2008 at 06:23 PM