Im Not Even Going to Ask What BAWLS Tastes Like

When I was in San Francisco I had the heinous misfortune privilege of drinking a "global warming-flavored" energy drink. There wasn't any normal sort of energy drink in the hotel's expensive bar/cafe/sandwich shop. In case you're ever curious, global warming tastes like feet.

It was nice; whatever flavor drink you purchased the company would donate a portion of the sales to that particular cause. Like AIDS. There was an "AIDS-flavored energy drink" as well. It had a red label and probably tasted like cherry phosphate.

I realize that there are numerous energy drinks on the market, all competing for your dollars. Like Vitamin Water -  name which is a lot catchier than We Put A Lot of Sugar and Crap in It Water. After the AIDS drink I thought that I'd seen it all. Oh no.

I'm going to start buying caseloads of BAWLS energy drink (nice blue bottle, eh?) and passing them out to men I encounter who CLEARLY need some BAWLS.

Me: "You look like you need some BAWLS."

Dude: "Excuse me?"

Me: "Here."

hands over blue BAWLS bottle.

Dude: "Thanks! That hits the spot!"

Freud overload. Please give me a moment.

If BAWLS isn't your thing, perhaps you'd enjoy this?

(Please try and read the "About Us" section without laughing. My first thought was "IT TALKS?")

Comments

[jen from boston]

laughed through this entire read. Ha. Here, have some blue balls and pussy. wake ya right up.

[rednexmama]

Oh. My. God!!! That is AWESOME!!! K, hope I don't get in trouble here, but... "Pussy starts conversations"???? BWAHAHAHA! Just made my day! Because it does start conversations, doesn't it?!

[JC]

HAHA!
The company I work for distributes Bawls products in the NW. We have an ongoing joke around the office whenever someone's drinking the Bawls.. Unfortunately I'm usually the butt of the joke with my ever so tasty addiction to Cherry Bawls..
(its surprisingly good, tastes like a really carbonated cherry soda)

[plumwin]

I would do anything to work in Pussy's marketing department and ditch the one I'm in now. I mean can you even imagine how fun that would be? The employees must wear diapers from wetting themselves continually during the day from trying to churn out their spiels. Great stuff.

[Gina]

I want to know what a corporate attitude is. Maybe if I drink some Pussy I will find out what it is NOT and that will answer my question by default.

[Rebecca Norwood]

I'm just thinking how incredibly hilarious it's going to be seeing people walking around with a can of pussy! I hope it tastes good =D

Have any of you tried 6 hour power?

6 Hour Power is an energy drink that’s sugar free, has an outstanding taste (doesn’t have that disgusting medicinal aftertaste), gives you extreme energy, enhances concentration, and improves performance; did I mention there’s no crash?!

6 Hour Power comes in 5 outstanding flavors (my favorite is Lemon-Lime), check ‘em out @: http://www.6hrpower.com/

I have the privilege of working with 6 Hour Power, I take one energy shot in the morning before work and I’m good to go!

Feel it fast
Energy that lasts

[Amy]

I think pussy is very tasty. Highly recommended!

[Queenie]

oh LAWD, I'm coming clean with this here and now (don't judge me!):
I buy Bawls. I buy Bawls by the CASELOAD, so much in fact that my husband and I have a RECURRING STANDING order every month for a case of Bawls to be delivered to our house until they get a cancellation notice or a newspaper clipping with our deaths mentioned. We're geeks.

PS they also make Root Beer Bawls, which is NUMMY.

[Christy]

Forwarded this to my husband who shared it with all the guys in his office.

Why can't I get that line from Joey in Friends - "Ribbed for her pleasure" out of my head?

[Kyla]

I love BAWLS. Dude. I used to drink them by the case before getting pregnant with KayTar and then I totally forgot they existed.