Oh My Effing Gee!

Finally, after months of bawdy teasing, a slavering, titillated world was treated to the season premiere of "Gossip Girl." I will never see this program, because if I did I might have to pluck out my eyeballs with a shrimp fork. But several people who are very important to me are completely saucer-eyed, mouth-agape, forearm-twiddling crazy about it. And they say the show is exactly as it is portrayed:

So what's the verdict? Was all the raunchy marketing worth it?  Did everyone's Gee get Effed?

Here in New York, the marketers augmented the OMFG campaign with bus ads that touted all the uneasy press the show has received. Quotes like "wildly inappropriate!" and "unbelievably crass!" and "watch hot pubescent socialites eff the ess out of each other!" Line up, America! It's Caligula in a tartan miniskirt!

Like I said, I haven't seen the show. So my soapbox is a little rickety, and only a few inches off the ground. But I'm having a tough time reconciling a culture that smacks kids in the face with coke-bonking and then is shocked--shocked!--when a famous teen like Bristol Palin gets pregnant. I am not a Republican, and I would sooner watch GG than vote for any ticket with her mom on it. But you know what? If you're a fan of the show, and Bristol's knock-uppery has your knickers in a bunch, unbunch 'em.