The Samurai Vs. The Scientologists

Y'all? This is so damn bizarre I have not the words. And I can't decide if it is par for the course regarding the...eclectic habits of Scientologists, or if this is just wicked scary and a talking point to be filed away for gun control lobbyists. I'll just state the facts, cause they are wackadoodle enough without any added snark.

On Sunday, a man rolled up to the Scientology Celebrity Center in Hollywood in a red convertible and came at a security guard wielding two Samurai swords. The security guard, fearing for his safety, shot the man dead.

Whoa! How many things are wrong here???

Now, there are several things that are totally crazy about this. The man, Mario Majorski, had ties to Scientology, and was known for very erratic and potentially violent behavior. He had made threatening calls to the church in the past, and had threatened a Mormon church as well. This is clearly a dude with major mental problems, and I am sorry that his life ended so violently.

THAT SAID, what the EFF is up with the firepower at the Scientology Center? Why did the security guards shoot to kill? Why not take the kneecaps out? Granted, Majorski had a weapon, but it wasn't a standoff with two guns involved. AND, as of this writing, no charges have been made against the guard who fired the fatal shots. There is something really wrong here, and I hope there is a serious investigation. I don't know how much we'll hear, as Scientologists are known for keeping things hush-hush, and I'd be lying if I said that even writing this doesn't make me nervous as hell, (note to Scientologists: You can sue me all you want. You can't get blood from a stone. Cheers!)  But seriously. Shooting to kill at the Celebrity Center? That shiz just ain't right.

In the spirit of the holiday season, there will be no jokes regarding people finally having enough of those personality tests Scientologists shill on street corners, no "his Thetans were in quite the tizzy" jokes, or anything regarding the public outrage that cannot be contained any longer regarding John Travolta's hairplugs, Jason Lee's mustache, or the quality of Beck's latest album. Your humble writer is, um...bigger than that? Yeah...Oh no.

Oh sweet Xenu, I'm gonna do it. I CAN'T HELP MYSELF!!!

Tom Cruise could not be reached for comment, but was overheard by the man placing the stepladder next to Katie Holmes so Tom could whisper in her ear that Cruise was pissed that he was, in fact, NOT The Last Samurai.

source

Comments

[veronica]

Dang - some people are truly bat-shit crazy!

I personally have no problem with how it went down though. Sure it would **nice** if they guy was able to survive, but if you come at me swinging swords like that, self-preservation is probably first and foremost. Not to mention you have to be a hell of a shot to knock out a knee-cap in situation like that - you aim for the torso because it's the biggest target and your best chance of slowing an attack down.

[deirdre]

Seriously? I would shot to kill anyone who came at me with swords.

This isn't the movies.

[jamiegp]

Yeah, your typical security guard probably isn't a Terminator-shoot-out-the-knees marksman, even when not faced with shiny swords. You pretty much just aim for the biggest part and pull the trigger, I think.

When I wrote about this the other day (yesterday) I noted that this obviously marked one cool point for Scientology under the "You are cool if you provoke attack by sword" rule.

But in my mind it was like a medieval, renn-faire kinda broad sword.

[Kaelak]

I agree with the shoot to kill peeps. Swords, especially when wielded by someone who knows how to use them or is crazy enough to do it anyway, are absolutely lethal.

[carmster]

Best TomKat joke of the day!

[Mike Sox]

As much as I am a lover and not a fighter, I gotta say, If someone is coming at me Kamikaze with 2 Samuri Swords, I am aiming for the head and chest. No warning shot. No legs. No wing. Head and Chest. and as many bullets as I have to offer.

The dude should of tried the Ninja sneak attack style rather than the ICHIBAN!!!!! Samuri frontal assault.

Scientologists might be dumb but they aint stupid.

Swords dont kill people, guys with big fuckin guns do.

[April]

Heh. Wackadoodle. Someone likes the Runway, no?

The Scientologists may not want to mess around with ninjas. Although that would make for one hella good death match.

[Lindsey]

Ditto everyone else. Unless you've fired a gun you have no idea how hard it is to hit a moving target. Especially one swinging Samuri swords at you. And knees are cnsiderably smaller than torsos. I have no issue with killing someone who's trying to kill me. Whne you make that immenent threat you kinda of have it coming.

[David]

His name was Mario Majorski. He was a former Scientologist. http://www.nydailynews.com/news/us_world/2008/11/24/2008-11-24_fatally_shot_scientologist_was_mental_pa.html

Issue #318 of The Auditor, a Scientology magazine, lists him as an attendee of the "Saint Hill Special Briefing Course" in 2004. http://forums.whyweprotest.net/625943-post13/