Top Chef New York - Episode 2 - Harsh! (plus Season 5 predictions)

Did you watch Top Chef last night? I am speaking of Episode 2: Show Your Craft.

Obviously you did, or you would have stopped reading this by now.

I can't believe they brought in chefs that auditioned and didn't get cast in the show to be judges. That shit was brutal.

BRUTAL! There is nothing like a bitter taste in ones mouth to skew their judging of food. Plus, some of the cooking was pretty lame.

Let me ask you a question:

**spoiler alert**

How did they not send Ariane home when Padma Lakshmi (my girl crush) SPIT HER FOOD OUT? She spit it out! Now, granted, Jill's food was weak. An ostrich egg does not make new American Cuisine.

Or hell, maybe it does. I don't know what New American Cuisine means either.

Now for the fun part. Top Chef Season 5 predictions.

Sarah's Top Chef Season 5 Predictions:

Alex: He won't be past the halfway point. He seems... befuddled.

Ariane: Being in the bottom 2 twice in the first two episodes does not bode well for Ariane. I say she is out of there in the next two weeks. For a seasoned chef she is making a lot of rookie mistakes.

Carla: I don't see her sticking around for long. She does seem crazy though, so she might be good for dramatic effect.

Danny: Which one is Danny? I get him confused with the other guy with the George Michael beard. This is the straight one, right? And why does he have those stripes in his beard? I don't get it.

Fabio: I say he makes top five, if not top three.

Gene: Gene is the wild card isn't he. It is almost like he doesn't know what he is doing but he keeps pulling amazing stuff out of his ass.

Hosea: He seems like a strong chef with good ideas. Hopefully he will stop buying canned seafood and stick around for a while.

Jamie: I say Jamie will go top three. She seems amazingly solid. She comes off like she knows her shit and her food looks good. Plus, she is the executive chef at Absinthe in San Francisco so we already know she can handle pressure.

Jeff: You know, when I first saw this guy talk I thought he was an idiot. Then he went sort of crazy in the first episode and didn't even get everything plated, and he still ended up in the top half! Maybe he has got secret skills. Maybe he is an idiot savant.

Leah: Leah is solid. Top five.

Melissa: I don't know. Every time they show her I just keep thinking about how weird her bangs are. I have no idea what she even cooked so far.

Radhika: When they interviewed her in the first episode I thought - she keeps talking about how she thinks she will be pigeonholed, she must be a one trick pony. Then (and this is sort of cheating) when I was looking for pictures for this post and I typed in "Top Chef, Season 5" there were a lot of pictures of her. There are even special pictures in the gallery of her and Stefan. Either those two hook up, she is friends with the Top Chef photographer,  or she will be around for a while.

Richard: Oh! Now I know which beard guy is which. This is the guy that tells us he is gay every 5 seconds. He must have come out last week. WE GET IT. YOU LIKE BOYS. It really isn't that novel in the food service industry.

Stefan: He is my pick to win the season. I know it isn't really a long shot since he has been in the top of everything so far but he is a badass.

There you have it.

What do you guys think? Stefan? Leah? Jamie?

PS - New York! I hope this means Harold and Sam will come guest judge.

PSS - Why can't I find a picture of the entire cast of Season 5 together? Is my Google broken? Did the Bravo advertising people forget to take one? Is it just too soon?