MamaPop™

Billy Bob Thornton Throws a Tantrum

Does anyone seriously care about this be-goated, freeze-dried wart?

Billy Bob Thornton was on Canadian radio yesterday and because CBC radio host introduced Thornton as an actor before discussing the music stuff - which Thornton had apparently asked the DJ, Jian Ghomeshi, not to do - Thornton threw a kitten fit in studio because he felt that Ghomeshi suggested that his music was a hobby. Instead of the most greatest awesome band in the Milk Way, apparently.

Watch the freeze-dried action after the jump.

Bristol Palin Has Baby, Names It Tripp

The world's second most famous teen mom, Bristol Palin, went and did it.  She gave birth to a son, Tripp Easton Mitchell Johnston.  Who is the first you ask?  Why Jamie Lynn Spears, who also can't name children, with that whole Maddie Brian nonsense.

I don't get Tripp.  I've always heard Tripp as a nickname for someone who is a 3rd.  Is Tripp a real name?  Then again my name is Jodi which is not a real name.  Everyone always asks me what it is short for and it is short for nothing.  My name is Jodi, which is a stupid not real grown up name.  Which is why I am sensitive to people who name their children stupid not real grown up names.

The Joy of Sex Has A New Edition, But Will Anyone Care?

When my pre-pubescent demands of "What's sex?" were blatantly ignored by all and sundry, I did what every other bookish kid did: I went to the damn library and found out myself. Much like countless others, I found myself (and my more pervy friends) flipping through The Joy Of Sex giggling into our fists at the beyond cheesy drawings, and gasping in horror that ohmygod, grown-ups really DO that? Yuck!

I, of course, grew up and realized that there was more to sex than 1970's drawings of hippies boinging against walls, and now, with the all new edition of The Joy of Sex, another generation will be able to laugh hysterically into their pillows at their first glimpse of "doggie style," right?

I seriously doubt it.

Haggis Rules Everything Around Me

Any American music historian will tell you that hip hop originated in New York City in the 1970s by Kool Herc. But University of New Mexico professor Ferenc Szasz thinks that the genre's roots can be traced back even further, to ancient Scotland where people would engage in something called "flyting."

The Lonely Island's "We Like Sports"

As you've probably heard by now, childhood pals Andy Samberg, Akiva Schaffer, and Jorma Taccone, aka The Lonely Island -- the team that brought you the SNL Digital Shorts "Lazy Sunday," "Dick in a Box," and "Jizz in My Pants" -- is releasing their CD/DVD debut, INCREDIBAD, on February 10th. INCREDIBAD will include 14 new tracks, and collaborations with Julian Casablancas, T-Pain, Norah Jones, and Jack Black (among others), and there's even been talk of TLI going on tour in support of the album. People, I SMELL AWESOME. Raise your hand if you'd pay good money to see "Dick in a Box" performed live (preferably with my boyfriend Justin Timberlake special-guesting)! Woo-hoo!!!

So anyway, in addition to posting a funny holiday greeting last week on YouTube, the TLI boys just yesterday posted a follow-up video to "Just 2 Guys" called "We Like Sports," which will appear on INCREDIBAD. Please to enjoy in full after the jump!

Dear Alaska Child Services: Please Help. Love, Tripp.

So, you probably heard that Bristol Palin had that baby. What you probably haven't heard is that that baby is already protesting the terms of his existence.

Photo in Search of a Caption: New Year's Eve 1962

(See more vintage awesomeness at CharlesPhoenix.com.)

More Made-Up Memoirs

Oh, YAY. It's another literary liar. I LOVE these guys.

No, really, I do. I am endlessly fascinated with fakers, from Janet Cooke to James Frey to (oh my god my FAVORITE) Margaret Seltzer. Or perhaps I just kind of admire the incredible BALLS it requires to be all, "Yeah, I was an eight-year-old heroin addict who was saved from the Holocaust by a gang of East L.A. wolves who threw apples at me, and stuff. What part of that don't you believe?"

Naked Spray Tans and the Elder Gods: A Day with Heather Mills and her Nanny

By now, everyone who thinks that ex-McCartney Heather Mills is worth a scrap of attention is aware that she is embroiled in a dispute with her former friend and nanny, the 24-year old Sara Trumble.

Trumble is claiming that her duties extended well beyond taking care of Mills' daughter Beatrice, venturing into the realm of blow-drying Mills' hair at 7:30 a.m. and administering a weekly naked spray-on tan to her employer.

So far Trumble has not been forthcoming about the full extent of those duties, but MamaPop.com has obtained a copy of her daily schedule.  After the jump: a titillating and bizarre glimpse into the world of second-tier British celebrities.

This Just In: Celebrities Smoke! (Wheeze Cough Cough)

I've never seen the show "Mad Men," but I know one thing about it for sure. Everyone, EVERYONE smokes. It is the first thing people say, besides "Mmm, scotch." It made me laugh at first, that ex-smokers salivated, smokers lit up, and non-smokers gasped in wonder/horror at how much a person CAN smoke, but the more I thought about it, the more interesting I found the phenomenon.

Then came an article in the New York Daily News about how celebrities who smoke try to hide their mortification and shame about their habit. And it got even more interesting.

So what is it with the media's fixation with the smoking habits of celebrities, anyway?

Takeru Kobayashi Proves that Fruitcake is Teh Ick

Ugh. I feel kinda bad picking on fruitcake since it's sort of the punching bag (er, punching brick) of the holiday food pantheon and I've heard tell of a fruitcake by Alton Brown that's actually good. But by and large it's just a loaf of candied fruit and sadness. And competitive eater Takeru Kobayashi was determined to eat a buttload of the stuff.

Philly Man Shoots Movie Patron For Talking During Benjamin Button

In my mind, there is probably no sin greater than talking at the movies. If there were cineplexes during the time of Moses, I'm almost certain that, "Thou shall not chatter in the house of celluloid entertainments, for I am the Lord your God and find this quite annoying," would have been included on those stone tablets he found on Mt. Sinai.

Possessing that conviction, I've been known to shoot some murderous glances at parents who brought their children to a film for grown-ups, only to fidget and shout things like, "MOM, WHAT'S HAPPENING? WHY'S HE DOING THAT? CAN I HAVE POPCORN!?" However, I would never shoot actual bullets at such a parent, mostly because it's a wrong and horrifying thing to do, but also because logic suggests such a retaliation would be far more disruptive to the patrons' enjoyment.

But I suppose some people don't possess my reasoning skills.

Grey's Anatomy's Lexie is Expecting Baby #3

First, how is Chyler Leigh -- Grey's Anatomy's Lexie Grey -- old enough to have three children? After checking, she's 26, which is my age and let me attempt to wrap my head around having THREE CHILDREN at my age. Hold on, I need to lie down for a quick moment. Now, stranger things have happened and stranger news stories have been revealed on MamaPop, sure, but she's just so doe-eyed and, also, that's a lot of tequila shots she missed out on in her early twenties. Memories of those tequila shots are (often) the only thing that has gotten me through these last eight months -- the eight months of my first pregnancy.

Amy Winehouse Calls Off Divorce

I'm not really sure how this works, but apparently a week on vacation in St Lucia has made Amy see things in a different light.  Which makes sense if her husband, Blake Fielder-Civil, was with her but he wasn't because he is in jail.

And when have they even seen each other this year?  Blake has been in and out and back in jail for a parole violation and Amy has been in rehab.  Lonely vacations always make me want to stay in bad marriages. 

Shocking: People are Small-Minded About Something Having to Do with Marriage!

One of the most frustrating things about all of the discussion this year surrounding marriage and what it is and who gets to do it is the notion that it's the business of anyone how two loving, consenting adults carry out their relationship. The big issue is, of course, the seemingly "duh" question of whether gay people had the right to legally marry. But the public intrusion into the private lives of people trickles down into the most ridiculous areas.

A Case of Two Celebrities Who Should NOT Hyphenate Their Names

First thing's first: I am unable to refrain from commenting about the photo above.

Kid-toucher 'stache? CHECK. Meticulously shaved chest hair? CHECK. Gold chain? CHECK. Jay Mohr is one step away from:

a) Living the good life in some Floridian retirement home named Coral Gables.

b) The rumored child predator who lived in a trailer next to the gas station close to my old high school.

c) Carl from Aqua Teen Hunger Force.

Upon Becoming Engaged To Tom Brady, A Letter To My Gisele

Dear Gisele,

So I heard. Yeah. News travels fast. He proposed to you on an airplane with 4 dozen white roses on Christmas Eve. Did he get down on bended knee? Oh that's right he probably didn't.

Heard you joyously accepted. But I'm having a little trouble reconciling your joyous acceptance of Tom Brady's marriage proposal with the hundreds of underwear pictures you mailed me. What happened, Gisele? I always looked at those pictures like I was reading some kind of dangerous promise. A dangerous, unkeepable promise.

You did me wrong, GB. You're no different from the rest. I've been down this path before...