Friday Eye Candy: The Anti-Candy

Okay, look, I'm not proud of what I'm about to admit, but it needs to be said, so I'm sucking it up: I watched I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here! this week. I think that I might be scarred for life.

I don't have much to say about the experience, other than at times it felt as though rocks - big rocks - were being pelted at my head while I was being forced to listen to Nickelback at high volume and that I kept watching despite the assault on my senses and what does that say about me really? I will say this, though: holy shitballs is Spencer Pratt ever a hateful douche.

Which got me thinking: how many truly hatefully unattractive 'celebrities' (note the scare quotes) are there out there? By which I don't mean, physically deficient, but rather, so horrible personality-wise that you just look at them and think wow. UGLY.

I mean, really:

He's not offensive looking in a still shot. But once he opens his mouth and yells at a woman or hoots about his wonderfulness or proclaims his Stephen-Baldwin-sanctioned Christianity or yells at two women or just, you know, says anything at all, the transformation is total: this is one weak-chinned, shifty-eyed, vacant-faced, screeching model of pure evil.

Are there more like him?

I could only come up with her:

Any other suggestions? Alternatively, because we don't need this to be Friday Eye Candy: Total Bummer Edition, feel free to brainstorm in the opposite direction and suggest people who are not conventionally Hollywood-style hubba-hubba physically gorgeous, but because they are so funny or so smart or so nice they just glow with hot (Ellen Degeneres, anyone?)

Oh, and to cleanse the palate:

 

You're welcome.

Comments

[schmutzie]

Chris Brown is cute, but, despite his protestations, he is a monster. He went from squeezable to hideous in one fell swoop.

[Jes]

Sadly I watch "I'm a Celebrity ..." too. Not that I'm above it - I watch terrible shows like Rock of Love Bus and Charm School. But when Spencer (who was playing for a charity, mind you) said, "I don't volunteer - I get paid" on his way out as he was quitting, I actually think he became the worst reality-tv, faux-lebrity on television ... probably ever.

[Just Shireen]

As much as I don't want it to be true I've been reading that Ryan Reynolds is a total douche.

[charlane]

I was ready to claw my eyes out on Monday - I only watched because I heard Heidi cried. He is a total waste of air....ugh. And that is bad considering I watch Daisy of Love and think he's worse than that.

But I do love Ellen.

[Martha]

Ugh. I'm so sick of Robert Pattinson. Can we just have, like, one free week without a Twilight reference?

[shine]

Nooooo. Please don't tell me this. No no no.

[shine]

Daisy of Love is a train wreck that I cannot. Stop. Watching. I hate myself for this.

And by the way, I love the comparison to Anne Coulter. But I don't know anything about these Spencer and Heidi people except that everyone is talking about them. How should I know them?

[BaltimoreGal]

You picked two of my favorites! Other celebrities who make me writhe in pain when they speak:

RYAN SEACREST- too many things to name
Craig T. Nelson (new to the list this week!)
Ashton Kutcher (Twitter thing)
Terrence Howard (baby wipes)
Any of the Baldwins, at this point (unless Alec is on SNL or 30 Rock- it's like an asshole-free zone).

Pamela Anderson (setting women back how many years)
Megan Fox ("Actors are either narcissistic douche bags or raging alcoholics")
Patricia Heaton (I think pro-choice is a ridiculous - you know... name)
Paris Hilton (take your pick)

[Erin]

Terrence Howard--good one. I had a huge crush on him after "Hustle and Flow." Then I started reading interviews with him--gah!

[Yvonne]

Good call on Patricia Heaton.

[BaltimoreGal]

I meant to put the part after Patricia Heaton in quotes. She said that on the O'Reilly Factor. She's not as bad as him, but still. GAH.

[JellyBean]

After watching "The Hills" for a couple of years and now "I'm a Celebrity ..." for 2 episodes I am completely convinced that Spencer's ego is all an act. He probably really is a douche bag, but I think all the drama on The Hills with Heidi's mother, sister, cheating on Heidi, etc was all fictional and they were all in on it and it was really bad acting to boot. I think Speidi have calculated every move they've made on "I'm a Celebrity" in advance to get the most media coverage out of the show and it has worked and that NBC is in on it. I think Spencer just plays up his assholeness to gain more fame. There is no reality in either of these shows.
P.S. You need to place a warning next time before I click over to see a picute of Ann Coulter. I was so unprepared for it and it scared me so bad I think I peed my pants a little.

[Martha]

OMG! Yes to the Megan Fox. She really just needs to stop trying to sound intellectual. (While posing with her mouth open, natch.)

[LovelyLayla]

Hmmm...people who are just like Spencer? Interesante.
I like how Paris Hilton and her douche of a BF called the Hills fake and all this other craptacular stuff. I can agree, but um, Paris? No need to explain the rest of that.
Bono
Kanye
Perez
John Mayer
Puff Daddy
Sean Penn
Eminem - seriously, we get it.

[LovelyLayla]

" They tore the labels off my dry shampoo! They aren't Christian! THERE ARE BUGS!!!!"

[LovelyLayla]

Agreed.

[LovelyLayla]

I've heard rumours that she's a major bitch. My uncle works for a limo service, and he had to drive her to a number of places and he said he refuses to ever drive her anywhere ever again.

[kris]

I'm so glad I'm not alone in thinking Spencer is quite ugly. I have never seen the Hills and I've only watched about 15 minutes of I'm a Celebrity (Celebrity should be in quotes). I can usually find something attractive in most people; good skin, a nice smile, sparkly eyes. Not with Spence. I have a physical reaction, almost a gag reflex, just looking at him. He looks bit like one of the middle dudes in an evolutionary chart.

[Palinode]

Ann Coulter looks more like a Sith Lord every time I see her. And Pratt of course looks like he's just eaten a tin can.

[Palinode]

I'm pretty much with you on this. Some of it is so clearly staged that I just sit back and enjoy it as insanely bad television. Pratt is wallowing in his put-on vileness, but one day he's going to stand up and find out that it's stuck to him forever.

[Snarky Amber]

Oh god, you know who belongs on this list? Mel Gibson. NOT YUM.

[JellyBean]

Just read that NBC is really "disgusted" with Speidi and is really going to make them pay with special challenges if they want to get back on the show. What a total set-up!

Let's not forget Russell Crow for the list too.

[BaltimoreGal]

YES! Especially when he had that big skunky beard. It's like his true self climbed out of his face.

[Accidental Housewife]

Can I put in some votes for Kristen Stewart, Cameron Diaz, Jessica Biel, Dr. Phil, Octomom, and everybody's favorites: Jon & Kate. Oh, and Katy Perry. And Cris Angel. And lately, Angie Harmon. I get it, you're a Republican, and apparently the "only one in Hollywood". Well, holy shit, where's your gold star.

[Accidental Housewife]

And Joaquin Phoenix. And Madonna. And Paula Abdul. Crap. This is terrible.