Hollywood's Top Earning Actresses, WTF Edition

OK, so I like to think I'm a bit of a movie buff.  But, it's been pointed out to me once or twice that I'm not a movie buff in the sense that I saw that obscure 1985 straight-to-video movie about the aliens who posed as gas station attendants, but rather I've seen Titanic 27 times and can tell you exactly what Kate Winslet was wearing when Leonardo DiCaprio sketched that one-legged prostitute (yellow and white dress).  So, I guess you can say I'm a discerning movie buff and like to watch the same ones over and over.  Sort of like a toddler now that I think about it.

ANYWAY.  All this to say, I was surprised over who topped the Forbes Top 15 Top-Earning Actresses List.  (I dare you to use "top" more in a sentence.)  I realize that this is just a ranking of how much money they made in 2008, not the quality of their acting, but STILL.  How is it possible that this person is the #1 top earning actress?

#1

 
ANGELINA JOLIE: $27 MILLION
You know it's weird, but in the right light some people say that I look nothing like Angelina Jolie.

And I just have to add this photo, because seriously?  When is pretending you're going to eat horse nostril sexy?

#2

JENNIFER ANISTON: $25 MILLION

(And I realize I was a bit hard on Jen the other day, but you have to understand I had JUST WATCHED THE BREAKUP.  Need I say more?)

#3

MERYL STREEP: $24 MILLION

#4

SARAH JESSICA PARKER: $23 MILLION

(Can you believe this was for Sex & The City?  One of the worst movies ever?)

#5

CAMERON DIAZ: $20 MILLION

(For What Happens In Vegas.  Yeah.  Talk amongst yourselves.)

#6

 

SANDRA BULLOCK: $15 MILLION

#6 (TIE)

REESE WITHERSPOON: $15 MILLION

(I love her because I KNOW she has the most organized cabinets.)

#8

NICOLE KIDMAN: $12 MILLION

#8

DREW BARRYMORE: $12 MILLION

#8 (TIE)

RENEE ZELLWEGER: $10 MILLION

#10

CATE BLANCHETT: $8 MILLION

(And best actress OF ALL TIME.  THE END.)

#12

ANNE HATHAWAY: $7 MILLION

#12 (TIE)

HALLE BERRY: $7 MILLION

#14

SCARLETT JOHANSSEN: $5.5 MILLION

And she's married to this.  So, she WINS.

 

#15

KATE WINSLET: $2 MILLION
(She must be so embarrassed.)

Comments

[JennC]

Jesus Christ on a crutch, I don't think I want to live in a world where Cammeron Diaz makes more money than Cate Blanchette and Kate Winslet COMBINED. That ain't right.

Also, ScarJo, you, your perfect boobs, and your pretty Canadian husband need to get out of my face. (No, I'm not bitter. Not in the least.)

[amy @ bitchin' wives club]

Where did you find these photos?! Your point of Hollywood being a ridiculous, misogynistic, sex factory are not missed....

And, seriously, how could Kate Winslet be that far down the list? Here and Cate Blanchett are my favorites.

[HIlary]

Why is everyone so hard on SJP?! I mean no one expected the SATC movie to be some kind of life-changing event! I can't help it, I must defend her fantastic-ness, beauty and even the movie. Have to.

[jennifer@cutiepiescards]

thank you for including a photo of ryan in here :)

[michele]

being married to ryan does make her win. lucky duck she is.

also, am i the only one who was like, um, what movie did any of those people actually make last year? i think like one of them made a movie that i can think of. leaves me very confused.

[Holly]

OK- the horse nostril picture? Hilarious. Thanks for the laugh.

I too am sad that Cate & Kate are not higher on the list. They (and Meryl) are the most talented of the bunch.

[ms martyr]

Jen did the Marley and Me tearjerker with Owen Wilson. The rest of the pack, I don't honestly know.

[Accidental Housewife]

Oy, sums up EXACTLY what I was thinking. Stupid ScarJo. That pic made me irrationally angry. Why does SHE get them??? Not. Fair. Just wait until next year when frickin' Megan Fox'll prolly make the list and my brain will melt. True story.

[Accidental Housewife]

Um, did lil' Kate not get TWO Oscar nominations this year?!?!?! WTF indeed.

[Alyssa]

That's exactly what I was thinking. I got Winslet, Hathaway and Blanchett for Rev. Road/The Reader, Rach. getting Married and Benjamin Button, respectively. But the rest left me at a total loss.

[Dub Sac]

You all know WHY Cameron diaz is so high on this list, right? She's been the face of one of Japan's top cell phone service providers for years. Girl is bankin' it thanks to Softbank. Brad Pitt works for them sometimes, too. There's a pretty funny commercial of him playing a random tourist with a cameraphone.

Speaking of, I suspect Japan's Softbank is responsible for two travesties! Now that I remember that commercial, I think it could be the reason Brad grew that hideous mustache to begin with...