John Mayer Is Not Celebrating Humptoberfest With Kristin Cavallari

What is it about John Mayer? He can date famous women the public loves, women who easily fall into the American Sweethearts category like Jessica Simpson and Jennifer Aniston, and rather than elevate his status, we all just wonder why they're dating such a douche.

There is just something slimy verging on creepy verging on serial-killer-esque about the man that robs me of the ability to find him likable, BUT, last night, he kind of won me over a little bit, because humour is one of the inroads to my heart, and he paved his way into it a little with his recent response to the rumour that he has been bumping uglies with The Hills' Kristin Cavallari.

Mayer has titillated me with his tweets before, but his denial on Twitter last night of having skewered Cavallari's kabob had me tittering:

 

I think he's being pretty clear. John Mayer is NOT high-fiving Kristin Cavallari with his penis. Good to know.

Comments

[Mrs. Wilson]

I follow him. He's the ONLY celebrity that I follow, simply because his tweets usually crack me up - along with the way he plays with the paparazzi. This think about Kristen Cavawhatzerface totally had me laughing.

[Austin]

Hilarious twitters aside, that neon green penis-onesie he's got going on is giving me hives.

[schmutzie]

Isn't it, though? That thing is just nasty.

[rebecca]

And then juice came out of my nose.

[lori]

i am now torn between wanting to get far enough down the page that I can't see that, wanting to read his tweets, hating his skeezy ways and wanting to follow him on twitter... Thanks for sharing this (and for the nightmares that will surely follow the pictorial accompaniment)

[Liz]

I hear you with the skeeze factor and was really annoyed when I watched his special on VH1, John Mayer Has A TV Show, a few years back and laughed the entire time.

DISCLAIMER: If you want to keep hating him, don't watch this.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nXUi93hbPq8

[BaltimoreGal]

I feel the same way. I loved the show. His tweets are funny. He was funny on Chappelle's show too. I just want to avoid him in any other way possible.

[Shannon]

In my mind, there are two John Mayers. The one who plays the catchy songs and does hilarious, self-deprecating things and the skeezy one who dates actresses and things. (And I can no longer hate him after watching that clip of the show. Too funny!)