Get Ready To Lose Your Breakfast: Jon Gosselin Sex Tape Rumors are Rampant

Well kids, it was bound to happen: The Enquirer is reporting that there's a sex tape of Jon Gosselin floating around.  That excites me so much that my clitoris just shrunk inside my body in horror and I may never see it again.  Thanks Jon, you take douchebag to a whole. new. level.

Jon's bodyguard Tom Meinelt was subpoenaed to testify against Gosselin in the lawsuit TLC has brought against him.  Meinelt allegedly witnessed Gosselin snorting cocaine on more than one occasion, and Meinelt also says he watched Jon Gosselin's sex tape.

Excuse me for a second.

*gag*puke*gag*barf*

Dude watched the sex tape?  Dude.  Why?

"Tom told me that Jon was secretly videotaped having sex with a woman in Los Angeles in October, and he's seen the tape!" said Stephanie Santoro the Gosselin's former nanny, who also had a fling with Jon. 

Okay raise your hand if Jon Gosselin hasn't been in your vagina.  When I call the guy a douche, it's all literal and shit!  He's hitting cervix everywhere!  How?  Don't these women have eyes?

"Tom said people close to Jon put a camera in his hotel room, and paid a girl to flirt with Jon and have sex with him."

It's all becoming clear now.  Go on Supernanny:

"He also told me that he saw Jon snort cocaine on more than one occasion, and that the more Jon got into partying, the more cocaine he used!"

Shocker.

If these two allegations are true, Gosselin could very well lose the TLC case, and custody of his kids.  If that isn't sad enough, that sex tape? Might surface on the internet.  Now that's sad.

{source}

Comments

[Angela]

Oh that's just... ew.

[cindy w]

Oh god. My gag reflex. I.am.horrified.

On the plus side, I think we found a new way for the CIA to torture people. "Talk, or we'll show you Jon Gosselin naked!" I'd tell them anything they wanted to know.

[Fairly Odd Mother]

Those Poor Kids. Seriously. I would pull those older two out of school right this minute and cloister them for a while. I can't even think about what other kids may be saying to them about their dad. I remember being 8, my oldest daughter is 8----they are way too young to have to deal with this nonsense. He is such an f-ing idiot to not think more about how this might affect his kids. (despite all his protesting that he does everything "for the kids").

[Katie]

No eight year old (or anyone else for that matter) should ever have to hear: "Hey, I saw your Dad's sex tape!" Those children, those poor children... What kind of nasty famewhores are having sex with that bloated potato? Ick! Ick! Ick!

[jodifur]

This case is soooo never going to trial. B/c then this tape would be part of the public record.

Then again, if it is released on the internet, it will be anyway.

Shudder.

[indycitygirl]

I cannot sleep,its 5:51 in the AM and reading this and getting a little barfy feeling,not the way I wanted to start my day..