I'd like to preface this post with the fact that I'm not super bright. So, maybe it's me. Maybe I'm the silly fucker in the "Dunce" cap in the corner. All slack-jawed and drooling and waiting for re-runs of Mama's Family. Probly.
The story started making the rounds on Facebook - a CNN piece about a young woman found at a homeless shelter in New York City, who claimed to have total amnesia. The story reads like a movie, and I'm sure it will be soon. I wouldn't be surprised if Lifetime already has the rights.
Well, well, so I was right. In a signed affidavit, Mayumi Heene, the mother of "Balloon Boy," admitted the whole nonsense was a hoax in order to get the family more media attention for a reality show. Dad still isn't talking.
In science-y, smart mo-fo news, and exoplanet conference was held a few days ago in Porto where a team of Smart MoFo's did a massive TA-DA(!) regarding their fancy new High Accuracy Radial Velocity Planet Searcher, or HARPS as it's known to the Fonzies of the telescope crowd, has discovered some 32 new exoplanets increasing the number of low-mass planets by a panty dropping 30%.
I think Mamapop's own Snarky Amber wrote beautifully on the Roman Polanski case, and I could never, nor would I attempt to, say it better.
But really, in case anyone still isn't sure why this was rape, or why we should care about it, watch the video after the jump.
Okay, look: I like Obama as much as the next person. He's just super. But can I ask? What exactly did he do to earn the Nobel Peace Prize? He's been in power for less than a year. He hasn't stopped any wars. The world doesn't feel, really, any more peaceful than it did last October. So, what? Am I missing something? Blinded by my inherently peaceful Canadianness and so unable to recognize extraordinary peacefulness in others?
Because, seriously: "extraordinary efforts to strengthen international diplomacy and cooperation between peoples?" Haven't Angelina and Bono been doing that for a lot longer than Obama has? Also, somewhere, Bill Clinton is weeping, you just know.
No, really: I'm asking in all sincerity, and am open to being convinced (dull Canadian maple-syrup-addled political scientist that I am, I fully concede that I might be ignorant about some of the President's more extraordinary exploits.) Am I missing something? And, what do you think?
(Again - so that nobody cuffs me here - I love Obama, as much as a non-American can. I think he's great. And I think that he might well contribute in an extraordinary way to the building of world peace. I just don't think he's done it yet.)
(**ducks**)
I would welcome this latest development as an interesting plot twist were this not some poor woman's actual life.
It's been reported that John Edwards has not only set up a residence for Rielle Hunter near the Edwards' family home in Wilmington, N.C., but that he's also preparing to make a public announcement soon admitting paternity of Rielle's one-year-old daughter, Frances, despite Elizabeth Edward's "vehement opposition".
Since Elizabeth has done her best over the last year to ignore both the affair and the resulting child, even forbidding the use of Rielle's name in her presence during interviews, it's no surprise that this news has FINALLY sent Elizabeth running for a divorce lawyer.
Despite her best efforts Rielle Hunter just won't go away and neither will this story. As a matter of fact, it's just getting started.
I'm not entirely sure how to feel about this but I am hearing rumors that Rihanna and Justin Timberlake are dating.
I am confused for several reasons.
1) I thought Rihanna got secretly married to Chris Brown. Not that this isn't still possibly true. I bet almost any priest would be willing to annul that nonsense.
2) I also thought Justin Timberlake was still dating Jessica Biel.
When does the hurting stop? Why have we not risen as one to stop this plague of madness? And today, as we cope with tragedy, we must ask: how many lives must be lost before Kevin James is stopped from ever making a movie again?
Granted, it's not quite as wrenching as the events that took place in Chicago last July, when a perfectly innocent Sparklecorn was torn apart and eaten by an angry mob like something out of Tennessee Williams, but nevertheless I think I speak for all of humanity when I say that when a Kevin James movie kills a giraffe... society as we know it has gone too far.
This has been a big week for the Beatles. Their new game (see insanely cool commercial below) The Beatles: Rock Band is on the top of many a gift list and their entire UK catalog (plus Magical Mystery Tour and Past Masters) has been remastered and rereleased with a depth and a clarity that so many of us are missing in our lives right now. Yes, once again we have found ourselves in times of trouble and the Beatles come to us. Words of wisdom and all that.
Here now the news...
Seth Meyers is only one man. And his hairpiece is pathetic.
Enter the Wiig.
Good evening, and what can I tell ya?
Kristen Wiig will be filling the empty co-anchor chair on SNL's Weekend Update. The seat was last sat on by one Amy Poehler who is no longer on SNL. However, Amy will sit in it again for at least two episodes of NBC's newest Thursday night hit comedy Weekend Update. No relation.
Jon Gosselin, the muse of Ed Hardy and bane of Kate Plus 8, has finally joined whatever century this is. Jon Gosselin is on Twitter. Next up, my mom.
That photo on the left? That a Twitpic. Believe it, baby.
Gosselin already has well over 13,000 followers which must make Ashton more than a little nervous. Guess how many people Jon is following. Go on, guess.
Do you like your religions fresh? Do you like the word of God dropped? What did you think of R.E.M.'s Radio Song?
If you answered any of the above questions then you are in luck. KRS-One is starting a new religion and it's both hip and hop. Introducing The Gospel of Hip Hop: The First Instrument, coming soon to a hotel dresser near you.
The tome is 600 pages about the divinity and spirituality of hip-hop, and according to Rev. One, "I'm suggesting that in 100 years, this book will be a new religion on the earth."
Have you ever wished that reality TV was actually real? Do you like men in tight pants? Beer commercials?
Are you ready for some football?
Yes, football. That's right, I'm taking MamaPop into some unchartered territory here: sports talk.
Remember a couple of years ago when that woman lied to a fertility clinic and told the doctors that she was 55 and she ended up having twins at 66?
Yeah, her of upstanding morals and no fucking clue what a multiple pregnancy can do to one's body.
Her name was Maria del Carmen Bousada de Lara and she died this week. Now her two year old twins are orphaned.
I woke up this morning and everyone got engaged. Well, not everyone, just Kate Moss and one of the Jonas Brothers.
No, silly, not to each other. Kate Moss is almost old enough to be the Jonas Brothers' mom. In fact she was 18 when Nick was born, so there is that.
Oh, you wanted to know who they are going to marry?
At 12:30 PST this afternoon a 911 call was placed from Michael Jackson's home when he stopped breathing.
Michael Jackson was rushed by ambulance to UCLA medical center where he was being treated for cardiac arrest.
MAMAPOP IS SMART POP CULTURE ANALYSIS, COMMENTARY, MERCILESS FUN-MAKING AND OTHER SUNDRY AWESOME, DISHED UP DAILY BY PARENTS, FOR PARENTS, AND ANYONE ELSE WHO UNDERSTANDS THAT PLAYTIME IS BETTER WITH VODKA. PLEASE TO ENJOY. READ MORE...
