MamaPop™

Dita Von Teese Makes Wonderbra Hotter Than My Mother Made It Out To Be

Dita Von Teese has launched a new lingerie collection, the Wonderbra Party Edition, and, frankly, I think I love it.

Generally, uber-femininity looks like crazy drag no matter what kind of genitalia is being concealed beneath the champagne pink silk gusset, but this nod to pin-up glamour from the mid-20th century is a kind of costuming I can get behind.

Is there such a thing as costume lingerie? Or is lingerie, by nature, costume? Well, no matter, because if lingerie is costume, then the Wonderbra Party Edition collection does it up good.

Gossip Girl Recap!

So, I watch Gossip Girl. Do you watch Gossip Girl? Come on, you can admit it. You can even say you just watch it for the clothes even if also watch it to lust after boys who are just so damn young. I'm not a causal, when-nothing-else-is-on-I'll-tune-in watcher, you should know, I'm a regularly-recorded-by-my-DVR, husband-knows-to-leave-me-be-on-Monday-nights viewer. I mentioned before I thought Leighton Meester is grossly overlooked by critics as Blair Waldorf, and I stand by that. So, Gossip Girl, one of those lovely guilty pleasures I don't feel all that guilty about watching.

I'll be recapping this season's episodes, sometime each Tuesday.

Last night's episode was the second of the season. What did we miss the first episode of the season? All the post-Constance kids returned from summers abroad and summers in bed and they're gearing up to start various different colleges and ventures. Let's begin!

Project Runway Recap: "Fashion Headliners"

  It is 10:02 P.M. and I am about to hit "play" on my TiVo, but I am looking at the episode title with a mixture of triumph and disdain because CLEARLY, I totally called the newspaper-fabric thing last week. But if I called it -- as someone who never even once correctly predicted the solution to a goddamn Encyclopedia Brown mystery -- then there are truly no surprises left in Project Runway Land.

NINA IS BORED, Y'ALL.

RUN FOR YOUR LIVES.

The Snuggie Invades Even New York Fashion Week

When I first saw ads on late-night television for the Snuggie, I have to admit that I was somewhat impressed, despite the fact that it is not a terribly new concept. The stupid idea that conventional blankets are inconvenient for lounging beneath was had at least as early as the dawn of the 1980s when my grandparents gave me something that might have been called a Cocoon. It was a quilt with snaps that, when done up, created holes for the feet, arms, and head. The problem with the Cocoon was that once you spent time figuring out the snaps and getting the thing put together, you were too hot to care to be inside it anymore.

This is where the Snuggie found its success. It forewent the business of energy-consuming closures like snaps, buttons, or strings and came out at a time when North American lethargy was at its historic height. No longer do we have to suffer the inconvenience of pulling blankets up after they have fallen from our shoulders and chests. We can finally watch more Snuggie ads while reclining with less effort than ever before!

The Snuggie has become so loved by the American public that we no longer want to keep its awesomeness penned up behind closed doors. This would be an injustice. Never fear, though, because this wrong has been righted. The Snuggie hit the runway during New York Fashion Week:

Just In Time For Back To School: Air Conditioned Pants!

Because shorts for fall is so 2008: behold, MESH PANTS.

Note that from the evidence of the pictures, it seems that you are meant to wear these without a top. Which makes sense, I suppose. I mean, if you're worried about keeping your knees cool, you've probably got chest and underarm concerns as well. Which raises the question: why not a mesh bodysuit?

Me and Posh: Separated at Birth?

Okay, I have to admit - at first glance Victoria Beckham and I would appear to have nothing in common. She's glamorous, rich and famous with three beautiful children and well - I only have two beautiful kids. But then I read some excerpts from her new interview in Elle magazine and I'm starting to feel like it was me laying out on that diving board posing uncomfortably in a zebra-striped romper.

Tim Gunn Calls Jon Gosselin a "Slob"

I have lower than zero regard for Jon Gosselin. Dads out there have a hard enough time earning parental consideration equal to that of mothers so it always churns my butter when unrelenting wads of irrelevance such as Jon Gosselin try to use poor fathering as a leverage to fame. 

Tim Gunn feels the same, methinks. He is number #5 on my Top Five List of People I'd Pay to See Tell Other People Off. (#1 Julia Sugabaker, #2 Clint Eastwood, #3 Samuel L. Jackson #4 Joan Rivers #5 Tim Gunn) 

"Designer" Snuggies. Crapping. You. Negative.

I don't know exactly how long this gift from heaven has existed, but I didn't hear about it until last night. When the commercial first came on, I thought for sure that I had accidentally ingested LSD. Again.

Kristen Stewart: Ice Road Trucker

Have you seen that show? The show where all the people wear plaid flannel? Because to wear that much plaid that often - and for it NOT to be the late 90s - your occupation must either be logger or ice road trucker. I never see those dudes in anything but plaid flannel. 

I'm not trying to be harsh on Kristen Stewart. She does aggravate me beyond belief with her too-hard attempts to be above it all. She seems more trailer than indie to me because the only other person that I know of who had a pot bikini and wore plaid was a cousin of mine down south whose occupation was welfare. Literally. Having babies and getting more welfare. She's always sputters to show exasperation and would it KILL HER to just kick the emotions up a notch? I reserve a tiny soft spot for her in my heart because she's playing Joan Jett and Joan doesn't mess around which makes me think that there's more than meets the eye with this actress. 

But this? IS NOT HELPING. 

My Pants Are SO TOTALLY Into You Right Now

Aligned with our ongoing, tireless efforts to call to your attention aspects of our culture that might be viewed as suitable for inclusion in this site's archives under the category documenting Signs Of The Apocalypse, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, I give you "Winkers^TM":

Quick Pic: Angelina Jolie At Last Night's Inglourious Basterds Premiere In L.A.

Okay, two things here:

1. What specific brand of amphetamine do you suppose she's using? (Those LEGS? ARMS? I mean COME ON.) (J/K Angie and her team of expensive lawyers! IS TEH COMEDY JOKES! FOR FUN!)

2. POCKETS on a leather dress? REALLY? (Okay that wasn't exactly a question, but I think you feel me on this.)

PS: I'm going to resist adding the category "This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things" here (which, to be completely honest, I think in one way or other could be applicable to just about every post I've ever written for this site) (plus it just makes me giggle) (and really, POCKETS ON LEATHER DRESSES?!?!). You're welcome.

So there's this picture that's been all over the internet, of Jon Gosselin exposing his stomach. There he is nonchalantly texting and at the same time treating us all to a glimpse of his blubbery mound. And while most people are wondering how he could be so careless, I tend to think he's doing it on purpose. It's like Jon's stomach is giving us the finger.

You all know about Google Reader, right? It's a handy way to compile all of the sites that you read in one spot, via the sites' RSS feeds. I'm completely obsessed with mine, especially since Google keeps adding new and amazing features to it. One of my favorite features is the ability to share interesting items with people in your Gmail contacts. Your shared items are also compiled on their own webpage. Here's mine.

With the premiere of the third season of Mad Men right around the corner, more and more items are popping up about the show...and I've been sharing all of them with my Gmail contacts because I. JUST. CAN'T. WAIT. FOR. AUGUST. 16TH. DRAPER DRAPER DRAPER JOAN BOBBY SALLY GIRDLES ADVERTISING OH MY GOD I NEED SOME SCOTCH AND SOME LUCKY STRIKES AND SOME SAMMITCHES FROM THE DELI.

Not to alarm anyone, but if the latest Naomi Campbell Attack report is indeed true then the period between assaults is becoming shorter and shorter and that could only mean one thing: Naomi Campbell is going to go Godzilla on us all by 2030, picking us off en masse with jewel-encrusted cell phones and left-hooks.

This time it is a photographer, Gaetano Di Giovanni, who is accusing Naomi Campbell of attempting to scratch his face off and roughing him up with slaps and handbag whippings in Italy. Naomi's camp is saying that this guy was following Miss Campbell in a boat the day of the alleged attacks and deny such an attack happened.

Pregnant Gisele Bundchen, who is expecting her first child with husband Tom Brady, appears almost nekkid in a sexy new London Fog ad campaign but her baby bump is nowhere to be found. According to a press release from the company, "...Most of the shots have been retouched to respect her privacy during this wonderful and personal time in her life.” Although, curiously, the statement then goes on to read, “Nobody is sexier or more beautiful than Gisele Bundchen in nothing but a London Fog trench coat, even with her visible baby bump."

Which leaves me with two questions:

1) If nobody is sexier than a pregnant Gisele Bundchen, why Photoshop her pregnant belly?

And

2) What kind of lame ass airbrushing job is that?

America's love/hate relationship with Crocs, the footwear made from anti-bacterial foam which may be the only thing that survives nuclear fallout, besides roaches, is now facing bankruptcy.

Is it begging the question to ask whether or not Crocs seriously expected a different scenario? They created a shoe out of virtually indestructible material with the only variance being another color or a slight difference in style. You can do one of two things with these shoes: wear them to garden in or wear them in the Wal-Mart.

I imagine that going as a douche for Halloween has to be one of the easiest and most accessible costumes, considering that all one needs to do is to purchase and wear Ed Hardy gear and voila!

It always amuses me how anyone can consider t-shirts and ballcaps "fashion." It's a T-SHIRT. Also, wearing a t-shirt with tattoos on it is not the same as actually having tattoos. Just saying.

I guess if this is your market, it makes sense to hire Jon Gosselin to work for your brand.

Jon Gosselin's Stomach Is Telling Us To Go To Hell

So there's this picture that's been all over the internet, of Jon Gosselin exposing his stomach. There he is nonchalantly texting and at the same time treating us all to a glimpse of his blubbery mound. And while most people are wondering how he could be so careless, I tend to think he's doing it on purpose. It's like Jon's stomach is giving us the finger.

Unleashing My Mad Men Excitement Here

You all know about Google Reader, right? It's a handy way to compile all of the sites that you read in one spot, via the sites' RSS feeds. I'm completely obsessed with mine, especially since Google keeps adding new and amazing features to it. One of my favorite features is the ability to share interesting items with people in your Gmail contacts. Your shared items are also compiled on their own webpage. Here's mine.

With the premiere of the third season of Mad Men right around the corner, more and more items are popping up about the show...and I've been sharing all of them with my Gmail contacts because I. JUST. CAN'T. WAIT. FOR. AUGUST. 16TH. DRAPER DRAPER DRAPER JOAN BOBBY SALLY GIRDLES ADVERTISING OH MY GOD I NEED SOME SCOTCH AND SOME LUCKY STRIKES AND SOME SAMMITCHES FROM THE DELI.

Naomi Campbell: And The Beat[ing] Goes On?

Not to alarm anyone, but if the latest Naomi Campbell Attack report is indeed true then the period between assaults is becoming shorter and shorter and that could only mean one thing: Naomi Campbell is going to go Godzilla on us all by 2030, picking us off en masse with jewel-encrusted cell phones and left-hooks.

This time it is a photographer, Gaetano Di Giovanni, who is accusing Naomi Campbell of attempting to scratch his face off and roughing him up with slaps and handbag whippings in Italy. Naomi's camp is saying that this guy was following Miss Campbell in a boat the day of the alleged attacks and deny such an attack happened.

Gisele Bundchen's Baby Bump Retouched for London Fog Ads; In Other News, Photoshop Lessons Now Available Online!

Pregnant Gisele Bundchen, who is expecting her first child with husband Tom Brady, appears almost nekkid in a sexy new London Fog ad campaign but her baby bump is nowhere to be found. According to a press release from the company, "...Most of the shots have been retouched to respect her privacy during this wonderful and personal time in her life.” Although, curiously, the statement then goes on to read, “Nobody is sexier or more beautiful than Gisele Bundchen in nothing but a London Fog trench coat, even with her visible baby bump."

Which leaves me with two questions:

1) If nobody is sexier than a pregnant Gisele Bundchen, why Photoshop her pregnant belly?

And

2) What kind of lame ass airbrushing job is that?

Crocs May Die, Maker Faces Bankruptcy

America's love/hate relationship with Crocs, the footwear made from anti-bacterial foam which may be the only thing that survives nuclear fallout, besides roaches, is now facing bankruptcy.

Is it begging the question to ask whether or not Crocs seriously expected a different scenario? They created a shoe out of virtually indestructible material with the only variance being another color or a slight difference in style. You can do one of two things with these shoes: wear them to garden in or wear them in the Wal-Mart.

Would You Buy Clothing (or Anything) from Jon Gosselin?

I imagine that going as a douche for Halloween has to be one of the easiest and most accessible costumes, considering that all one needs to do is to purchase and wear Ed Hardy gear and voila!

It always amuses me how anyone can consider t-shirts and ballcaps "fashion." It's a T-SHIRT. Also, wearing a t-shirt with tattoos on it is not the same as actually having tattoos. Just saying.

I guess if this is your market, it makes sense to hire Jon Gosselin to work for your brand.