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"Movies" Archive


November 06, 2009

Not Shaun Of The Dead. Still Looks Funny.

3808258863_30fcc04fd2 If I really had to pick my favorite genre of film it would be horror-comedy even though there aren't that many of them and the good ones are rare. That's why I'm a little bit Richard-Pryor-in-Brewster's Millions-when-he-finds-out-he-has-inherited-all-that-money-but-before-he-realizes-the-catch about Tucker & Dale vs. Evil which just released a trailer and looks like it might be the most amazing thing ever since hyperbole was invented. Or at least pretty good.

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November 04, 2009

Dear Hollywood, Back Off of My Berenstain Bears. Please?

Berenstain-bears-movie It seems many of Hollywood's recent movie hits are remakes and/or ripped from our childhoods, which I know is nothing new, but I kinda want them to back off my beloved memories a wee bit, yanno?

Confession: I wish Where The Wild Things Are had remained a classic book.  (Which yes, it still is, but the movie is so scary I won't take my 5 year old son to see it. It really should have remained a book where a child could fill in the blanks with his imagination.  I never imagined any chicken's arm getting ripped off, did you?)

Now I'm hearing rumblings about bring the beloved Berenstain Bears to the big screen. My Berenstain Bears.  *sob*

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November 02, 2009

Anvil Made Me Cry

Anvil_300_2 I don't  watch documentaries because there is usually a distinct lack of killer robots or flesh-eating undead or terrible visions of future dystopias in them. But this weekend's Box Office had little to offer so I rented Anvil: The Story of Anvil, and was pleasantly surprised because even though it was about Canadians and heavy metal I still enjoyed it immensely.

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October 30, 2009

Your Halloween Horror Movie Exploding

Poster Maybe you think I like torture porn movies like Saw because...well, let's be honest...it says "porn" right there in  the name... it's not like it's that huge a leap.I really don't though because that nice Cary Elwes was Wesley in The Princess Bride and that's just cognitively dissonant. What I do like though is The Horribly Slow Murderer with the Extremely Inefficient Weapon.

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October 28, 2009

6 Murderous Psychopaths: A Halloween Gift From MamaPop To You

Nightbreed_CronenbergAs an extension of MamaPop's ongoing effort to bring you the best in wholesome, family-friendly fun, we'd like to offer you the following list of some of our favorite murderous psychopaths. Some you may know, some you may not... but all of them deserve a very dark, twisted and frightening part of your life.

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October 27, 2009

"Powerful... So Powerful. Sensitive... So Sensitive." Happy Birthday, Rebel Without A Cause!

Rebel_Without_a_Cause_Poster By Michael Roe

54 years ago, today, Rebel Without a Cause was released, a film since deemed “culturally, historically, or aesthetically significant” by the Library of Congress’s National Film Registry. It was James Dean’s second film (and his second-to-last), and the movie that made the young man an icon. 

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Fresh Hell: Mall Cop Director to Remake Short Circuit

Short_circuit Here's some input I didn't really need: Steve Carr, the d-bag responsible for Paul Blart: Mall Cop, has been signed by Dimension Films to direct a remake of Short Circuit, the 1986 sci-fi-lite flick in which a robot out-acted Steve Guttenberg and Ally Sheedy, which is almost an impressive feat.

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October 26, 2009

Year One Rented. Good Taste Police En Route.

13yearone I just got around to seeing Year One, because I saw the previews and used my superpower of knowing when things are going to be suckish ahead of time and just didn't, but then it's Sunday night and I have to write about something for Mama Pop, so it was this or The Proposal or stapling my tongue to the roof of my mouth, and I couldn't really write about the stapling thing because that's not really pop culture-related. And all the copies of The Proposal were out. And I hate my eyes and my ears and my intellect.

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October 23, 2009

Ken Jeong Is The New Asian Seth Rogan

Ken_jeong_role_models I don't usually write about actors but I guess thugs marks the exception to the rule, because guess what?, that's exactly what I'm doing. I'm pretty much a lone wolf. But in this case I'm a lone wolf against my own rules and that makes me extra Lone Wolfish. The actor? Why... Ken Jeong, of course! And why am I writing about him? Mind your own business.

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October 19, 2009

What it Lacks in Diablo Cody, It Makes Up For in Killer Sharks

Dvd_sharks_in_venice (1) Sometimes, as a movie reviewer, you have to make difficult choices. There are only so many films you can watch and only so many eyes you can watch them with and only so many dollars you might be willing to shake down kids at your son's elementary school for, because no matter how talented and brilliant you are, no one at The New York Times will return your phone calls. 

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October 14, 2009

Best of the Worst - A Personal Top 5 Horror Films for Your Halloween (Dis)Pleasure

Original
When I was a boy, my parents would sometimes send me, usually late at night, down the hill behind our small farmhouse to close the chicken coop.  Fucking foxes would eat the chickens, other, less carnivorous animals would eat the eggs.  So, there's my 9-10 year old self, flashlight in hand and a silent scream in my throat.  Legs tense, ready to bolt at the fist sign of the Boogieman or Frankenstein Monster or the crazy, toothless guy that sold firewood around the area.  It was commonly know that he ate children.  That didn't stop us from pelting his old beat up truck with snowballs in the winter though.  Everyone knows that child-eaters fear a well packed snowball.  It's their Kryptonite. 

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Going Bump In The Night: Six Movies For Your Hallowe'en Viewing Pleasure

The_Orphanage  In a stunning piece of news that might've slipped beneath your usually impeccable radar, it's October. I'm not even kidding — you could look it up. In even more stunning news, the end of October means Hallowe'en, a night of trick-or-treating fun and stupid-ass parents who like to pretend they're stuffed scarecrows sitting in a chair next to the front steps until some cute little kid comes along and suddenly they jump up and scream bloody terrifying murder and scare the living bejeezus out of some sweet boy or girl who's been waiting all year to go out as a fairy princess or Superman. I fucking hate those parents.

What were we talking about? Oh, right... Hallowe'en, October... blah blah blah. More pertinently, October is the month where all right-thinking Americans (and the occasional right-thinking Canadian) choose to celebrate the dimming of the day and the fleeting popular embrace of ghosts, witches, demonic were-creatures and other critters not usually welcomed into genteel society by engaging in the time-honored tradition of watching lots and lots of horror movies. Why? Because, unlike children, we can make the conscious choice to be scared — because we understand and experience it as entertainment, as 90 minutes of escapist fun that frees us from the dreary bonds of our day-to-day and provides us with the vicarious thrill of gambling with our lives.

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October 12, 2009

Couple's Retreat is Funny, if You're Deaf and Blind and Are Reading Dirty Jokes in Braille.

Couples_retreat My mother always says if you can't say something nice, don't say anything but she's a dumb, lazy whore so why should I listen to her? (Get it? I'm NOT doing what she says and calling her a whore so that's double funny for anyone keeping score at home.) Any way... I saw Couple's Retreat this weekend and only saying nice things about it is like a Battle of the Network Stars, and on the ABC Team is Mr.T, and Michael Knight, and Murray from Riptide, and my team is the PBS team and all we have is Grover, and that claymation Davey kid from the religious show that was on before Sesame Street, and Jordie LaForge with eyes from Reading Rainbow so it's pretty much an uphill battle, is my point. 

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October 09, 2009

Marlon Wayans Hates You. Also Richard Pryor's Ghost.

281x211 In the ultimate "Those words don't make sense together" move, Happy Madison Productions has green-lit a biopic picture about the life of Richard Pryor, and playing the lead role will be Marlon Wayans because he's just about the funniest black entertainer  working today if you don't count pretty much everyone else and Robert Downey Jr. in Tropic Thunder and that one guy who slipped on a spilled strawberry-banana Jamba Juice© in front of Gruman's Chinese Theater the last time I was in Hollywood. Because that guy was really embarrassed and upset. Heh. Slip-and-fall injuries equals funny in my book.

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October 07, 2009

Mel Gibson Retroactively Sober; Anti-Semitic Rant Still Going Strong

Mel_Gibson We've always thought of Hollywood as a magical land of make-believe, where dreams come to life and anything that can be imagined can be made real on the screen. But in a stunning new twist that seems to defy the generally acknowledged laws of the space-time continuum, Mel Gibson has suddenly and miraculously gone back in time and stopped himself from driving drunk.

As MamaPop's Jodifur reported only a week ago, onetime idol of millions Gibson has been seeking to have his DUI expunged from the legal record, as is apparently the right of first-time DUI convictees who manage to make their way successfully through court-ordered meetings and public service. On Tuesday, that wish was granted by a California judge.

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Disney's "First Black Princess Movie": Should We Be Worried About This?

Disney-princess-frog In a word: no. Or at least, probably not, but from the looks of the first five minutes of Disney's upcoming The Princess and the Frog - the movie that's being called its "first black princess" movie - it seems that Disney might come out okay on this one. Sure, it's just five minutes - which leaves somewhere in the area of 75 to 90 minutes for Disney to trip-up with some dodgy racial sterotypes - and we are, after all, still talking princess movie -  but these are a pretty good five minutes.

Watch them after the jump:

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October 05, 2009

Zombieland Makes Money. And You Can Too...

539w I went out to see Zombieland over the weekend and like finding a severed toe in a box of Corn Flakes, it was a big surprise. I'm not saying it was a surprise like I went there expecting a zombie movie and what I saw was an artistic interpretation and allegory for the woes of our society personified as the unholy walking dead. What I mean was I was expecting "okay" and what I got was "really okay". I mean...it's a zombie movie...not the works of Fellini we're talking about here.

The movie was awesome. And I'd love to tell you more but you'll have to click on the link because this is what's called a "teaser" in the business. And I'm not sure what business that is, except I'm pretty positive it isn't the installation of heating, venting or air conditioning. Funny business? Like Porky's? (*shrug*)

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