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[Editor's Note - Miss Banshee is on medical leave from MamaPop. Today's recap of The Bachelor is by guest author and MamaPop alum Kristen Howerton of Rage Against The Minivan] I’ve long since abandoned any hope for most couples who meet on The Bachelor, but by the time each season’s finale rolls around I can [...]
Here we are for the reunion show! I’ll be blunt. I can’t remember ANY of these skeezers’ names, so I’ll be relying on the chyron A LOT. Which means I’ll be pausing and rewinding a lot, which will piss me off even more than this show usually makes me. GRAND ENTERTAINMENT. Wait. I piss you [...]
Well, we’ve all been waiting for this, have we not? It’s time for FANTASY SUITES, MOFOS!!!! Get your booze and your vomit-proof pets ready. Tonight! On The Bachelor! We go to Switzerland! Whores lie! Benny blabs! We all roll our eyes into our skulls! And someone returns! And then, it’s a “very special sneak peek” at [...]
Oh christ on a bike, here we go. TONIGHT! On The Bachelor! It’s home visits! Kissy kissy huggy huggy horses, awkwardness, and DADDIES NOT PLAYING. That makes me happy, mostly because I think if my daddy met any of my exes in a dark ally, things would…be bleak. Let’s go! Lindzi is of course with her [...]
Tonight on The Bachelor! We’re off to Belize, which really didn’t do anything to deserve this. Hopefully their tourist industry will survive. ANYWAY. Six remain. Lots of tongue action. Lots of bullcrap declarations of luuuurve. And Dead Shark Eyes gets outed for being a total See You Next Tuesday. Will it work? LET’S FIND OUT! [...]
TONIGHT on The Bachelor! We’re in Panama City, Panama, which is gorgeous. Everyone is in lurve with Benny. Dead Shark Eyes is fixin’ to have ALL the girls rat her out for the beesh she is. And Casey S gets a message from Harrison that sends her into hysterics. LET’S DO THIS. Who put all [...]
Okay, we’ve all seen the commercials and the naked and the rose in the water. Are we ready for this? I mean, does everyone have their beverages and their Xanax at the ready? Because I have a feeling this is going to be quite the episode. And I mean “episode” in the “psychotic episode” kind [...]
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