Jessica Simpson Leaves The Gym And The World Goes Nuts


Jessica Simpson Pregnant, 2012

On May 13, 2008, I became a mom. I had a pretty little bundle of screaming joy, and all was right and awesome with the universe. She was 6 lbs, 1.4 oz, and 21 inches of adorable. I, on the other hand, was a droopy mess of exhausted new mom who desperately needed a shower. [...]

Mariah Carey Is The New Jenny Craig Spokesperson, Done Making Babies


mariah-carey-post-baby

In the land of diet delivery food, Jenny Craig is top of the pops.  In the land of pop, Mariah Carey was, at one point in her career, also tops.  What better marriage than Jenny and Mariah to teach new mothers that a) their baby weight is evil and disgusting and b) melts off like [...]

Heidi Klum Bares (Almost) All in German GQ Making Mothers Everywhere Even More Envious


Heidi-Klum-GQ C’mon, Heidi, we know you’re gorgeous and have a great figure… but do you have to rub it in?  Posing for steamy lingerie shots not even a year after birthing your fourth child and looking so FABULOUS is just not fair to the rest of us.

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