The World According to Everyone But Paris Hilton

The World According to Paris Hilton Tanks in Ratings, Collective Consciousness

Paris Hilton is making yet another attempt at a “comeback” (although a comeback to what is uncertain) with her reality show, The World According to Paris Hilton.  She appeared yesterday on The View where she finally (finally!) was grilled with some real questions and not softballs for this no-talent [media] whore.  Bahbwa and Whoopi questioned [...]

Gary Busey Hits the Stripper Pole

gary-busey-stripper-pole

ENOUGH WITH ALL THIS CHARLIE SHEEN NONSENSE. I CAN OUT-SHEEN CHARLIE SHEEN IN MY SLEEP. WITH MY EYES CLOSED. WHILE I’M SLEEPING WITH MY EYES CLOSED, EVEN. WHICH I ACTUALLY DON’T DO THAT OFTEN. I’VE BEEN AT THIS FOR YEARS, PEOPLE. I AM THE FAMOUS ORIGINAL RAYS OF NONSENSE ROBOT-GENERATED MEME QUOTES. WHERE’S MY HASHTAG? [...]

Lady Gaga’s Born This Way (That is, Covered in Goo)

Lady Gaga Born This Way

A frame-by-frame (kinda) exegesis of Lady Gaga’s new video, “Born This Way.” Bring your waders.

Turn Your Head and Cough: An Investigative Guide to Celebrity Doctors You May Hate

Rehab me, Dr. Drew. My addiction is YOU!!

Celebrity Doctors: Quacks worthy of hate and ire? Maybe not so much. I investigate so you don’t have to!

Alexa’s Best of 2010 or Maybe the Year Before

bored-to-death-hbo

So, I was all set to make a Best! Things! Of 2010! list, except…all of the things I thought of to put on it? Are from 2009. I don’t know how this happened! I am a late bloomer, I guess.

Jurgen Nation’s Top Favorite Favorite Viral Videos of 2010 Resistant to Antibiotics and Cold Sore Ointment

Intervention-Best-Cry-Ever-Viral-Video

The best viral videos of 2010, according to Jim. I mean, according to me. Jim’s a d*ck.

Trout Towers’ Guide to Gracious Living

party-dress

People ask me all the time for tips on living a gracious life. And who can blame them? I mean, just look at me. What’s that? You can’t see me? You’ll just have to trust me, then. That’s what this guide is all about. Trust, and how horribly misplaced it generally is. Tip 1: Always [...]